Unfortunate Last Names

I've always thought my last name was pretty bad. And I mean that in the literal sense. 'Boese' means 'bad' (or angry) in German. But its meaning wouldn't matter much if only English-speaking people could pronounce it (it's 'burr-za', as if it had an 'r' in it... not 'boose'). But I shouldn't feel too sorry for myself, because this guy in Brazil, Mr. Reinhardt Adolfo Fuck, has me beat hands down. As far as I can tell, that really is his name. He must get endless jokes about it.

Identity/Imposters

Posted on Thu May 20, 2004



Comments

I knew a girl in middle school whos last name was pronounced Beg-a-vitch. but the teachers would never write it for some reason.
Posted by Jeff  on  Wed Jul 02, 2008  at  06:44 PM
There were football players in the world cup with the names of...
Bossio, Neto, De Harder, Grip, Wolff, Rough, Pardon, Angel, Van Heel, Popov (pop off), Robotti, Perfumo, Titchy, Jelinek (indeed), Chumpitaz, Bats, Springett, Boy, Junior, Costly, Oh, Rats and Gu Sang Bum.
Posted by A. Nonymous  on  Thu Jul 10, 2008  at  12:10 PM
I had a middle school teacher named Harry "Burger", I don't remember the proper spelling of his last name, but it was basically hairy burger.
Posted by Jeff  on  Wed Aug 13, 2008  at  02:47 PM
double phallic name: i used to work with a guy,whos name was peter johnson.

and mr. & mrs.pig named their baby daughter,iona
Posted by whiterabbit  on  Wed Oct 01, 2008  at  12:57 PM
As for aptonyms, where I used to work, the IT manager was named Matt Hacker. My former boss had two managers named Mr. Spring and Mr. Poole when she was a secretary at the water department.
Posted by Spartacus  on  Thu Oct 02, 2008  at  03:22 AM
We have dicussed the name Aaron Scott (S......) last name- which would make the child's initials A.S.S. -

While this has a small chance of provoking teasing during childhood, we both agree that it would be FUNNY to be able to initial things ASS.

When the teacher has students grade one anothers' papers - "pass your paper to your neighbor on the right, and put your initials on the paper you are grading' -- ASS.

When signing a mortgage (many initial spots) ASS ASS ASS ASS. Or a tax return ASS.

We will probably actually do this. We both feel that if it was our initials spelling ASS - we would make it benefit us and have a sense of humor about it.
Posted by gwebel  on  Sat Oct 18, 2008  at  11:07 PM
A neighbor's daughter went to high school with a girl named Asshole` (Pronounced Ash-olay). [What kind of people do that to their own kids?]
Posted by Bruce  on  Sat Oct 25, 2008  at  09:50 AM
OK, here's mine:

I knew a girl who's stepfather's name was Dick Swift.

I had 2 music teachers, Mr. Horne and Mr. Piccolo.

We had a math teacher named Ophelia Dick (TRUE!)

I knew a cardiac surgeon named Dr. Bloodwell.

I knew a PA named M. Butkus.

And, my last name (growing up in NY) was FUCHS (pronounced fewks).
Posted by Lori  on  Tue Oct 28, 2008  at  12:39 PM
There was a boy in my 3rd grade class named Brent Sweeney.
I guess it was a lot more funny when I was 8.

And there was a couple that I graduated with.. Their names are Kristin Koch (coke) and Matt Bonar (bonner). Haha. I would have never even bothered if I were them.

And then there's my grandmother's name.. Marilyn Carolan.
Most of us Carolan's pronounce it "Care-oh-lin" but my grandma refuses to say anything but "Car-lin". I guess I don't blame her. [:
Posted by Jourdan Carolan  on  Wed Dec 10, 2008  at  11:17 PM
I know a couple of gotta laugh at people... Sandy Muff out of Vernon BC, Anita Dick out of Manitoba, Spider Mann- my future sons name haha, Justin Uras of Calgary, Unis Aichelle another future child name of family, Collen Gay from Calgary, Jack Horse- reason for this one comes from the saying--- If jack helped you of the horse would you help jack off the horse?, Ken Moore I don't know where you live!, Richard Begone, and Yu Mi Wee Fite who was in a newspaper article.
Posted by Brad  on  Sun Jan 25, 2009  at  09:00 AM
I've always liked the names:
Mike Oxmall and Mya solebernz.

Mike Million 2-18-2009
Posted by Mike Million  on  Wed Feb 18, 2009  at  03:28 PM
When I was in grade 8, I had a science teacher named Ms. Knott
To which everyone on the p.a. would pronounce MISS SNOT
Posted by Nicky B  on  Sat Feb 21, 2009  at  02:04 PM
While singing in choir, I've come across a composer named "Richard deLongis."

I'm (somewhat) proud to say that I was the one in the choir who noticed this.
Posted by Alex  on  Thu Feb 26, 2009  at  12:15 AM
I used to do business with a guy named Dick Blewitt. I think he used Dick instead of Richard just to watch people squirm when he said his name.
I also know not one, but two people named Larry Lawrence! Finally, I grew up with a Brian O'Brien.
Posted by Lee  on  Tue Mar 24, 2009  at  06:24 PM
;-P these r all hilarious
Posted by piper  on  Tue Apr 21, 2009  at  09:16 AM
I remember a Harry Dong running for ILWU president a few years ago.
Posted by James Eduard  on  Mon May 18, 2009  at  05:42 PM
I hate even doing this because she is a friend...but she got married and goes by the name Ball-Savage. Also...her Dr's name is Dr.Finger.

One of my favorite is my dads Dr. Dr.Balldoc
Posted by Mike  on  Thu Jun 04, 2009  at  06:17 PM
It is a pity that the guy has such a name.Just like it.
Posted by Jess Holroyd  on  Sun Jul 12, 2009  at  09:18 PM
My middle school teacher was named Mr. Weed. Unfortunately his first name was Richard.
Posted by Heh  on  Tue Aug 11, 2009  at  02:19 AM
In Kindgergarden there was a boy named Dick Hunt. He was a junior and when I was married my husband worked for his father Dick Hunt, Sr. The wife would refer to them as "little Dick" and
"big Dick" and the two respond to their names. Who would name their son that?
Posted by Imagine That  on  Mon Sep 14, 2009  at  05:43 PM
I almost dated a guy whose last name was Schnegelberger
Posted by Amber Jones  on  Thu Oct 08, 2009  at  05:11 PM
In the 8th grade, I had a teacher named Sylvia Pussey. She pronounced it pew-say, but to a bunch of 14-15 years old, that didn't make a bit of difference. She didn't last the school year. I wondered how she made it through her school years.
Posted by Charlene Dussy  on  Mon Oct 12, 2009  at  01:43 PM
I wanted to comment on the second comment on the first page. The comment about Speedy Nutz, he is my grand father and he is indeed real, however his brother was not named Fuzzy, it was James, he was also a dentist but he was a dentist in Escondido, CA.
Posted by Zachary Bahen  on  Fri Dec 25, 2009  at  05:54 PM
clearly, you got it way ahead of the Brazilian guy. lol. :lol:
Posted by clarissea  on  Tue Jan 12, 2010  at  09:23 PM
my second name is hooker
Posted by neil  on  Sun Jan 17, 2010  at  10:24 AM
always thought my maiden name was pretty bad--it is Steinke (pronounced stein-key). Yeah, my nickname was stinky. At least I was a girl and could marry out of it...so I married "up" to Cornforth...HA!
Posted by M  on  Fri Jan 29, 2010  at  06:54 PM
I have a friend who's last name is Drunkinbrod....I bet wis wife gets a lotof jokes.
"Hello...I'm Mrs. Drunkinbrod."
Posted by Alan  on  Sat Jan 30, 2010  at  06:21 AM
my second name is hooker and i got a make called caelan (KlAn) and every 1 calls him gaylan cos it sounds like his name (i forgot the words that means they sound the same :grrr:
Posted by neil  on  Tue Feb 09, 2010  at  10:52 AM
I had a teacher called called Mr Death. It was pronounced "Deeth", or so he said. If you had the nerve to call him Mr Death, you were issued with a detention. So we kept it behind his back.
Posted by waldron76  on  Thu Feb 18, 2010  at  05:09 PM
There's also a Scottish footballer called Paul Dickov, who doesn't get nearly enough praise for his name. And Thomas Crapper, who didn't actually invent the toilet, but certainly manufactured them, is a brilliant aptronym. And the word "crap" predates him, which makes it all the better.
Posted by waldron76  on  Thu Feb 18, 2010  at  05:28 PM
Wikipedia has a whole list of aptronyms! Bernie Madoff, who "made off" with investors' money, made me laugh.
Posted by waldron76  on  Thu Feb 18, 2010  at  05:31 PM
@ Lee in Boston, you may have worked with Dik Blewitt, but I dated him. Even my then senile grandmother said "what kind of name is that? Is he a porn star?"
Posted by palegreeneyes  on  Tue Mar 02, 2010  at  09:04 PM
new a guy named Dick Upright
Posted by john  on  Wed Mar 03, 2010  at  03:03 PM
There was a teacher in my high school Mr. Raper.

My dentist was Dr. Payne.
Posted by Mac  on  Sun Mar 21, 2010  at  04:21 PM
One of my sisters had a Merry Christmas in her high school class. Cute, though probably not "unfortunate."

There was a Bill Crook's Food Town in Nashville, Tn.

I had a math teacher in college Dr. Swindell. Usually pronounced "Swindle."
Posted by Mac  on  Sun Mar 21, 2010  at  04:35 PM
The German name "Fokker" means "breeder," exactly what our word "fuck" literally means. In German or Dutch, the owner of a stallion that is stood at stud or a mare that is bred is the "fokker." (Doesn't mean that (s)he does it personally.!!)
In German the same word that is legitimately used is also an insult or a slang term.
Probably "fuck" came through the Germanic language Frisian or Friesian, the Germanic language closest to English. There is, or was, a Dutch aircraft engineer named Anthony Fokker. Many models of his aircraft were used by the Germans in WWII. There are many Fokker planes in production and use now.
Posted by Mac  on  Sun Mar 21, 2010  at  04:42 PM
I once worked in a lockshop and a customer who used to come in every year, dressed in some tribal gown, black as the ace of spades signed his cheque book Chief Banjo.
For some reason he used to buy a hundred Yale cylinders at a time, I guess for export.
Posted by Wittybebop  on  Mon Mar 22, 2010  at  07:02 AM
I went to school with the son of Dr. Speedy R. Nutz from Chula Vista, Ca. He was Dan Nutz. His roommate at the time was a guy by the name of Dave Cox. They thought it rather amusing at BYU to place the sign on their door that read "Cox and Nutz".
Posted by Randy  on  Sun Apr 04, 2010  at  03:06 AM
My last name is Plague... can't get much worse than that
Posted by Andrew  on  Thu Apr 08, 2010  at  08:21 AM
There is a woman on the Japanese volleyball team named Yoshi Takeashita. It's not pronounced like we all want to pronounce it though. =/
Posted by Drew  on  Sat Apr 10, 2010  at  12:00 AM
My name is Drew Helbig... it's really not that unfortunate but I do get the occasional... Har Har you Drew Helbig not that I mind it really. 😛
Posted by Drew  on  Sat Apr 10, 2010  at  12:03 AM
haha, i like the knocka name stated in the comments, here is a funny joke i saw about bad last names
http://ponderingstuff.com/2010/02/05/bad-last-names/
Posted by Travis  on  Sun May 02, 2010  at  06:32 AM
One of my mother's childhood friends was a girl named Candy Cane.
Posted by Kathleen  on  Sat Jun 26, 2010  at  07:41 PM
That is is real name, he is a professor in my university(UnB), geology teacher indeed, he is a "fucking" good teacher and researcher, P.h.D since 1975. Take a look at his curriculum: http://buscatextual.cnpq.br/buscatextual/visualizacv.jsp?id=K4787180T7
Posted by Vitor  on  Thu Aug 26, 2010  at  06:32 PM
I got you all beat ... no pun intened =)
Posted by Hugh G. Rekshon  on  Thu Sep 30, 2010  at  04:24 PM
Sorry, Hugh - we are going to have to see a birth certificate and driver's license before you can claim a prize there. 😊
Posted by D F Stuckey  on  Thu Sep 30, 2010  at  04:26 PM
I was looking up Miley Cyrus' family tree to see if she's 100% pure white trash or not, and I think she had an ancestor named Hooe... HOW DO YOU PRONOUNCE THAT? Hoo-ie? Hoo? Hoe? Or are all of those wrong? And is it German? Because Haas is German, and it's fairly similar because it's another 4-letter last name beginning with H and has a double vowel in the middle, and sounds silly (but not as silly as Hooe).

There's so many people called Butz and Cox... and who could forget Smellie? I actually know an Oliver Smillie. Poor man...

And is Farton a real last name? It sounds convincing to me :lol: I know Glasscock is real!
Posted by Amala  on  Thu Nov 18, 2010  at  01:01 AM
"100% pure white trash"

Salt of the earth. The elite would have to wipe their own butts if there weren't any white trash. Probably couldn't tell the difference between their upper and lower orifices.
Posted by Mac  on  Mon Nov 22, 2010  at  12:48 PM
There was a Glasscock's Grocery in Farmington, Tennessee many years ago.
Posted by Mac  on  Mon Nov 22, 2010  at  12:50 PM
I once met a person whose name was richard butram he knew how it sounded and went by dick to be funny. Can't believe parents would actually do that to their child. Now you have people naming their kid after fruit and the material jeans are made out of. Ridiculous.
Posted by breast augmentation  on  Thu Dec 02, 2010  at  10:31 PM
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