Hoax Museum Blog: Technology

Spray-On Mud — If you have an SUV, then you're probably going to want to use it off-road sometime. After all, that's what it's designed for. But if you have no time to get out of the city, then no problem. Just use Sprayonmud to make it look like you've had a wild time driving around the country:

Sprayonmud is a specially formulated spray-on product for anyone that wants to give friends, neighbours, colleagues or just anyone at all, the impression that they have been off-road or, at the very least, out in the country for the weekend...
Sprayonmud comes in an easy-to-use plastic bottle which is just the right size for hiding in a green Wellington boot.  Keep it in your garage, in the boot, or anywhere you like.  Sprayonmud can be applied to your vehicle in seconds, but just be careful the neighbours don’t catch you using it!  And remember, you’ve been visiting friends in the country!

Mud in a bottle. What will they think of next?

Das Keyboard — I'm pretty sure this isn't a hoax because it's possible to place an order for it. However, it still seems extremely odd to me. It's a keyboard marketed to 'ubergeeks' under the brand name 'Das Keyboard'. This is the part that gets me:

Das Keyboard is an enhanced 104-key USB PC keyboard equiped with 100% blank keys mounted on precision and individually weighted key switches... Since there is no key to look at when typing, your brain will quickly adapt and memorize the key positions and you will find yourself typing a lot faster with more accuracy in no time. It is amazing how slow typers almost double their speed and quick typers become blazing fast!

So it's basically a keyboard with all symbols removed from the keys. I can type over 100 wpm, and I don't normally look at the keys. But occasionally you need to. I would find it very annoying to never be able to look at them, and I find it hard to believe that anyone would want this as a feature.

The Oil Computer — Markus Leonhardt has come up with an ingenious way to cool his computer. He immerses the entire thing in vegetable oil:

Markus Leonhardt has taken the shortest route possible to liquid cooling.
1. throw motherboard in fish tank
2. cover in vegetable oil
3. there is no step 3
Markus has been using this system for over a year. it is quiet and is cooled by the still functional fans circulating the oil. he has swapped components and even successfully used pulled hardware in other pcs.

This just boggles my mind. Wouldn't immersing your computer in vegetable oil short circuit it, or something like that? I also would have thought it would overload the fan motors. There are color pictures of the Oil Computer here, as well as more description, though most of it is in German. (via Reality Carnival)

Battery Charger — Here's a cool idea for a battery charger. What makes it great is that it's totally portable! Finally a cord-free charger.

Does Email Cause IQ Loss? — A widely reported story last week stated that a study conducted by Hewlett Packard found that "Workers distracted by email and phone calls suffer a fall in IQ more than twice that found in marijuana smokers." Sounded like bad news for people like myself who are constantly checking email. But Mind Hacks has examined the study a little more closely and found its results aren't all they're cracked up to be. What the test actually found is that people do worse on IQ tests if they're simultaneously trying to answer email and phone calls. Which isn't surprising. But this 'IQ loss' only lasts for as long as the distractions last. In other words, you're not really losing any intelligence. Reading email simply stopped people from focusing on the test.

Tale of a Clueless Hacker — A story is going around about a clueless hacker who gets mad with a chat-room moderator and tries to take revenge. He asks the moderator what his IP address is. The moderator tells him it's 127.0.0.1. The hacker apparently doesn't realize this number is geek-speak for home. It's the IP address of whatever computer you're currently using. Try to connect to it and you'll simply connect to your own computer. So the hacker plugs 127.0.0.1 into his hack-tool and then begins to gloat as he sees the hard-drive of the computer he's connected to disappear. He doesn't realize that he's erasing his own computer:

"I can see your E: drive disappearing, he gloated, "D: is down 45 percent!" he cried, before disappearing into the ether."

Hard to say if the story is true or not. The original version of it is in German. Slashdot has a lot of discussion about it.

BIOPRO EMF Harmonization Chips — Cranky Media Guy sent me a link to this interesting product: BIOPRO Chips. BIOPRO describes itself as a leader in the field of EMF harmonization devices. You see, you may not have realized it but, as BIOPRO tells you on their website, virtually all electronic devices emit dangerous electromagnetic frequency (EMF). Phones, microwaves, computers... You name it. So what's a person to do? Simple. Get some BIOPRO Chips. These amazing chips are designed to defend against EMF. Apply some of them to your electronic devices, and EMF emissions will be 'harmonized', thereby rendered harmless. It took me a while before I figured out exactly what these 'chips' were. But then I figured it out. 'Chips' is a euphemism for 'stickers'. BIOPRO is selling little stickers that are supposed to protect people against 'electro-pollution'. Of course, the website contains no explanation of how or why these stickers would work. Obviously that's because these stickers won't do anything but lighten your wallet by a substantial amount.

The Great Toothing Hoax — About a year ago 'Toothing' was the hot new thing everyone was talking about (well, okay, that a few people were talking about). It was the idea that people were using bluetooth-equipped mobile phones to find sexual partners in public places such as commuter trains. Toothers would beam messages to other people with mobile phones, 'Hey, wanna hook up?'... and if the answer was affirmative then off the two would go. This practice got a lot of media attention, but it's turned out that it was all a hoax dreamed up by Ste Curran and friends. He tells the story here. He decided to spill the beans after people on Slashdot (Jim Hanas in particular) started wondering what had ever become of the toothing craze. Jim contacted Curran, who was the creator of the original toothing forum, and got the confession. Curran states that: Despite all the made-up ramblings on websites across the globe, despite the forums and the fan-fiction, the tabloids and the broadsheets, the perverts and the simply curious, no-one has ever ever, ever toothed. There's always the possibility that toothing was real and Curran is lying when he now says that it was a hoax, but given the two options I think it seems more plausible that toothing was always a hoax.

Car Park Theft — A sign photographed outside a pub in England bears this warning:

CAR PARK THEFT
Dear Customers,
Thames Valley Police have brought to our attention that thieves now have the technical means to identify electrical products hidden anywhere within a vehicle INCLUDING THE BOOT!
Lap Top Computers being the main target.
Please note we are happy to store most items for the duration of your visit just ask at the bar.

The question this raises in my mind (and the mind of the person who took the picture) is whether thieves really do have the ability to detect laptop computers hidden anywhere in a car, or is the warning a hoax? I suppose it would be possible to detect hidden electronic gear, given the right equipment. But it doesn't seem like the kind of stuff your average thief would be carrying around. And why does the invitation to give your laptop to the guy behind the bar seem a bit fishy?

The Balance Bar — From the Balance Bar site: The "Balance Bar" is a simple browser extension programmed to allow any user to editorialize any web page anywhere on the Internet. The "Balance Bar" will literally insert your comments/article/rant directly onto whatever web page you would like to expound on. The "Balance Bar" was developed because of the increasing need to "balance" the one-sided and isolated worldview that much of our media sources produce.

I can't decide if this is real or fake. I could see that it would be possible to program a browser to float comments on top of a page. However, the comments would only be visible to you (the browser user). I can't imagine it would be possible for a browser extension to insert comments onto a page so that the comments would be visible to other people (i.e. to actually alter a page that's stored on someone else's server). In which case, I don't quite understand the purpose of the extension. Since I use a Mac, I can't download the program to test what it actually does.

BatMax: Does It Really Work? — BatMax is a wafer-thin product that promises to dramatically extend the life of rechargeable batteries, while simultaneously decreasing the amount of time it takes to recharge them. How exactly does it do this? Well, you know, nanoceramics... patented IonXR technology... blah, blah, blah. Basically, to me it sounds like a tinfoil sticker that does nothing at all but lighten your wallet a bit. Though maybe it really does work. What do I know. However, I see that the folks over at Gizmodo and Slashdot are skeptical as well.
Update: Some guy tested whether battery extenders really work, and found that they did extend the life of batteries by about 10-15%. So maybe there is something to this nanoceramics thing.

Angel Light Sees Through Walls — Troy Hurtubise claims that he's invented a machine, dubbed the Angel Light, that can see through walls. It doesn't really matter what the wall is made of: wood, ceramic, steel, tin, titanium, even lead. The Angel Light can see right through it, just as if a window had opened up in the wall. Of course, he built this thing in his garage (where else?). The idea for the invention came to him in a dream, and he built it without the aid of any blueprints, drawings or schematics. Although Troy may hope to one day be known throughout the world as the inventor of the Angel Light, he's already well known as the inventor of the URSUS MARK VII, a suit that can help a man withstand the attack of a Grizzly Bear (see that suit in the right corner of the thumbnail? That's the Grizzly suit). So from Grizzly Bear suits to Machines That Can See Through Walls. No one can accuse him of not having an interesting resume.

Online Gamers Anonymous (Status: Not A Hoax) — I came across the On-line Gamers Anonymous (OLGA) site recently and can't make up my mind whether or not it's a hoax. It's a site "of, by, and for on-line gaming addicts." Some of the stories shared on its message board seem a bit farfetched. Take, for example, the tale of Tommy, a former EverQuest addict. Tommy complains that:

Before EverQuest I used to have nearly a perfect life, I was living the american dream if you will. I hade a wonderfull job, a great house, a beautiful and lovely wife and most importanly my 2 beautiful little girls wich I love dearly....now I've lost everything because of this game.

As he relates his tale of woe, Tommy shares one unforgettable detail with us. He says that in the depths of his addiction it became so hard for him to tear himself away from the computer that:

I decided to set up a little pot in my computer room so I wouldn't have to get up when I needed to go pee, as much as this may sound ubelivable I can assure you it's the truth.

One thing that made me suspect this was a hoax was that there have been other gaming addiction hoaxes, such as Mothers Against Videogame Addiction and Violence. However, after reading this article in Wired about gaming addiction (by Daniel Terdiman), I'm inclined to think that OLGA may be real. Terdiman relates how hard-core gamers can begin to have problems separating the game from reality. One lady describes swerving her car around the road because she thinks she's still playing a game. Another lady, a Sims player, sits at her computer thinking 'What percent of my bladder is full?' instead of going to the bathroom.

So what is it about gamers and their reluctance to urinate? I'm now imagining thousands of solitary gamers sitting there with pots in their rooms.

Update (09/19/2005): The owner of OLGA has stated that it is "a REAL service provided for people who are addicted to computer/video games and have no where else to go."

Update (13/2/2007): OLGA has now moved to a different website.

Remote Autographing Device — The novelist Margaret Atwood, having grown tired of attending book signings in cities throughout the world, has invented a strange new device that may eliminate author appearances altogether in the future. It's a remote autographing device. The author sits in the comfort of their home and talks to a tv screen. In a bookstore thousands of miles away a fan talks back. If the fan wants an autographed book, the author simply scribbles something on a tablet. The tablet then transmits this scribbling to an in-store machine that produces an identical copy of the message in a book that the fan can take home. It reminds me of a high-tech version of Jefferson's polygraph machine. I predict this idea will take off just like that idea someone had back in the '50s about how we could all eat nutrition pills instead of real food (via Neil Gaiman).

An Interview with Hiroshi Yamauchi — An interview with Hiroshi Yamauchi, former president of Nintendo, has been doing the rounds. It's supposedly published in the February issue of Wired. The interview is quite colorful, to say the least. For instance, at one point Yamauchi claims that during a meeting with Microsoft's Steve Ballmer he said to him, 'hey, Ballmer, why don't you suck my tiny yellow balls.' This was his response to Microsoft's offer to buy Nintendo. The quotation is offered up in bold letters in the sidebar, so there's no chance you'll miss it. There's also some other equally outrageous stuff. Is any of it real? No. It's a fake interview and a fake Wired magazine mock-up. Digit magazine has an article debunking it.
Update: Inquirer.net apparently thought the article was real.
Update 2: According to this article, Nintendo has officially confirmed that the interview is a hoax.

Christmas Lights Webcam Hoax — Alek Komarnitsky claimed that his christmas lights were web-controlled. Visitors to his site could turn them on and off, and view their work via a webcam. So people with visions of inducing epileptic seizures in his neighbors were busy clicking away. Alek even took a helicopter ride with a local TV station and showed them the lights on his house madly flashing as thousands of visitors to his site supposedly turned the lights on and off. But an article in today's issue of the Wall Street Journal reveals that the web-controlled christmas lights were just a hoax. The mad flashing seen from the helicopter was caused by his wife operating a remote control in the house, and the webcam images were generated by a computer program, though as Gene points out in the hoax forum, the guy's story about how he rigged up the webcam to simulate activity is so convoluted that one suspects the revelation of a hoax is itself a hoax. I guess that in this case we'll just have to trust the WSJ. This all reminds me of that web-controlled toilet that was popular a few years ago (you could remotely flush it). I can't remember whether or not that too was a hoax and sadly I can't find any links about it either.

Nokia Speed Trap Detector — According to an email urban legend, certain models of Nokia phones have built-in radar detector that you can activate via secret code. Obviously this can't be true. But what I'm curious about is if a radar sign actually will appear on certain models if you follow these instructions. I could imagine bored engineers programming this in as a joke. Since I don't have access to a Nokia phone I can't test it out. Here's the email:

Nokia Speed Trap Detector
The settings for radar speed traps detector.
Your Nokia cell phone can be programmed to pick
up radar speed traps, when programmed your cell
phone picks up the radar and alerts you on the
message alert tone. ( Doesn't work with Nokia
7110! )

1. Enter your menu
2. Select settings
3. Select security settings
4. Select closed user group
5. Select on
6. Enter 00000
7. Press ok
8. Clear back to normal, within a few seconds
your phone will display a radar sign with five
zero's next to it. It is now activated.

Unfortunately only Nokia phones have this
function. Cell info display needs to be de-
activated. Settings -> Phone Settings -> Cell
Info display
Each time you turn off your phone, or even each
time you loose contact with your carrier, you'll
have to activate it again... It is done by steps
1 through 5, but the number (00000) will be
already on the field as default.

Port-O-Jet — Paul Stender has built a jet-powered outhouse. He calls it the Port-O-Jet. No it doesn't run on natural gas (the obvious joke). But it can reach speeds of 46 mph with a good tailwind. The hoax is that it doesn't actually function as a toilet. Pity. Now if he could make the toilet work, and then outfit it with wireless internet access, it could be the world's first jet-powered iLoo.

The Leg Shocker — The Leg Shocker is an add-on device for PlayStation 2, specifically for the games EA Sport's FIFA 2002 and FIFA World Cup 2002. Using this device allows you to feel the game, so to speak. It's a modified shin guard with a built-in hammer that bangs your shin if your virtual player on the screen gets tackled, tackles someone else, etc. There's a movie of the Leg Shocker in action. It's not clear to me if this is an actual working device, or just an art-project concept.

1954 Home Computer Claims Victim — There should be an award like the Darwin Awards, except instead of being given to people who die in stupid ways it would be given to people who display extreme gullibility. If there was such an award, Scott McNealy, CEO of Sun Microsystems, would be this week's candidate for it. During the keynote address at the Oracle OpenWorld Show he displayed a picture, supposedly from 1954, of what the RAND Corporation imagined that a home computer would look like in 2004 (see the thumbnail: click to enlarge). His point was that people fifty years ago could hardly imagine what the computers of today would look like, and we can't imagine what computers will look like fifty years from now. But the picture he showed wasn't fifty years old. It's a hoax photo that's been going around the internet for the past three months. It began its life as an entry in a Fark Photoshop contest (theme: "Photoshop this mock-up of a submarine's maneuvering Room"... this photo easily won the contest). Apparently, McNealy hadn't yet learned where the photo really came from. Now, I'm sure, he knows.
Update: Here's a Popular Mechanics article about the 1954 Home Computer image and its creator, a Danish software designer named Troels Eklund Andersen.