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FatSox -- April Fool's Day, 2000
The Daily Mail revealed that American scientists had invented "FatSox" — socks made out of a revolutionary new material that actually sucked fat out of a person's body as they sweated. The discovery promised to "speed up the fight against flab without any extra effort."

The socks employed a nylon polymer that reacted with a newly-patented compound, Tetrafloramezathine, in order to draw fat out of the bloodstream: "As the exerciser warms up, molecules in the sock are activated by the increased blood flow and the material draws out the fatty liquids, or lipds, from the body through the sweat." After a good workout, the socks, and the fat, could simply be thrown away.

The socks had been tested on human "guinea pigs" at the Esporta Health Club in Crawley, Sussex. The club manager said, "Some of us were sceptical about these 'fat magnets' at first, but as your body gets hot you can really feel them working." As a result of the successful test, Esporta planned to offer the socks for sale, at £15.99 for a pack of three.

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All text Copyright © 2014 by Alex Boese, except where otherwise indicated. All rights reserved.