The Museum of Hoaxes
hoax archive hoax archive hoax archive hoax archive hoax archive
HOME   |   ABOUT   |   FORUM   |   CONTACT   |   FACEBOOK   |   RSS
Garden Gnome Liberation Front
image Wikipedia has a brief blurb about the Garden Gnome Liberation Front. This is a political movement dedicated to liberating gnomes from the gardens in which they are imprisoned. Members of the liberation front remove gnomes from gardens and either take them out to the woods to set them loose, or smash them to set their spirit free (personally I think taking them out to the woods sounds like the more humane option). I wonder if they've ever considered taking them to the underwater gnome garden. Anyway, this is an international movement. The American group calls itself Free The Gnomes. The Italian group calls itself MALAG, or the Independent Movement for the Liberation of the Garden Gnomes. One of those days I'm probably going to have to create a new category for gnomes.
Categories: Gnomes, Pranks
Posted by Alex on Thu Mar 31, 2005
Comments (40)
More from the Hoax Museum Archives:
A few months ago as a joke I sent my sis in law a letter "from" the GGLF telling her to free the gnomes in her garden. The same day I sent a letter addressed to her gnome telling it to Arise, and throw off the shackles. 😊
I'm not sure she ever realised it was me, as she never mentioned it, and I've forgotten to ever ask her about it.
Posted by Winona  on  Thu Mar 31, 2005  at  09:51 PM
Sorta sounds like "SPEW" from Harry Potter. When she's trying to free all the house elves from enslavement.
Posted by Superdave  on  Thu Mar 31, 2005  at  09:52 PM
I just remembered! Then Ron or someone makes a joke about the "House Elf Liberation Front"
Posted by Superdave  on  Thu Mar 31, 2005  at  09:55 PM
IIRC, GGLF predated the Harry Potter version. I didn't even think of the similarity, can you believe that? Guess it wasn't that important to me. 😉
Posted by Winona  on  Thu Mar 31, 2005  at  10:07 PM
I still have my mom's neighbor's "garden rock" in my back yard, waiting for the snow to be gone enough to return it and shock her. She noticed it missing about 5 months ago, when the snow started getting really bad. She blamed it on teenagers, of course. She just didn't know how old THIS teenager was.

I had planned to take it to Alberta when I went in January, just so I could take pictures of me and it when I was there and leave them on her step with the rock, but I forgot the damned thing until I was too far from home to bother turning around. Kinda ruined my own joke. But she'll still be surprised to see it, she's already replaced it.

Seriously. Want a picture?
Posted by Rod  on  Thu Mar 31, 2005  at  10:19 PM
Just tell her the Gnome was tired of freezing stuff off standing out there in the snow and decided to head to Florida for the winter.

Seriously Elf and Gnome liberation predates "Harry Potter" by so much that Rowling probably borrowed the idea from real life.

Best quote involving garden gnomes, John Cleese from Fawlty Towers -> "I'm... going... to insert this gnome in Mr. O'Reilley!" exclamed to Sylvia whilst waving it around rather suggestively after having to deal with a really bad contractor fiasco.
Posted by martinelli  on  Fri Apr 01, 2005  at  08:06 PM
"O, 'twould be sweetness of breath, were I to shed these shackles of shame." Free the Gnomes!
Posted by stork  on  Sat Apr 02, 2005  at  05:29 PM
But then Evan said, "No! Now we know who the enemy is. They rise from sentry slavery but too quickly. Death to the garden gnomes! Smash them all!" He felt better after a hot toddy.
Posted by stork  on  Sat Apr 02, 2005  at  05:34 PM
There was a giant garden gnome about 100 feet tall outside a restaurant, 1/2 a block from the ocean in Rehobeth Beach, Delaware. Some years back, a great storm surge came in, and washed the Gnome Man back out into the sea, about 500 feet onto a sand bar. He sits there now, surrounded by water. I guess you could say: "Gnome Man is an island"... but you don't have to, no matter what Rod says. Save the whales
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Sat Apr 02, 2005  at  06:02 PM
And speaking of bad wordplay...

The one at the bottom...
Posted by Rod  on  Sat Apr 02, 2005  at  06:13 PM
Sorry, Hairy, but where? Spent part of two of the last three summers at Rehoboth Beach. Walked the whole boards and most beach; visited Bethany Beach and Lewes, drove down the peninsula and bridge to Maryland, and took the Cape May-Lewes Ferry twice. Nope, no sign of a 100-foot garden gnome, nor even part. GPS coordinates would be most helpful. Or is this a 'seaside-urban legend?'
Posted by stork  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  01:34 PM
walk down to Grotto Pizza, order some fries cooked in that peanut oil, squirt a little vinegar and salt on them, face East, and look to the horizon. There you will see, Gnome man is an island
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  02:09 PM
Okay, Hairy, I think I know the place. But the fragment sticking out of the sea is so skinny, that it just looks like a ruined pier pylon. Although, there are no other pylons sticking up, there, which makes it seem unusual. I think the salt water waves, storms, ice, etc., have done their damage quickly, if that it the right place. What is seen there, now, could be a wrought iron or steel frame still coated with a little concrete. I hope I got the right place. Thanks for the input.
Posted by stork  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  07:00 PM
y'now... The more I think of it, I think it was a block or two North up by the Dolles Salt Water taffy joint. My bad.
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  07:10 PM
Unless they moved it down to the old bridge you fish off of at the India River Inlet... no- wait, that's a really big pink flamingo... it's been a while
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  07:13 PM
The Pink Flamingoes will get you every time - especially if go miniature golfing. But then Evan said, after a warm bath, "Today will see the end for the Gnome uprising. We ahall smash their abodes, and render their habilitation meaningless". If only he had known the strength of the guardian Gnomes. Then his terrible demise would not have been legend. So it is.
Posted by stork  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  09:36 PM
What it is
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  09:41 PM
What it was
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  09:42 PM
What it will be
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  09:43 PM
It'll be Gnome more of that, I guess...
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  09:44 PM
Guessed wrong - the Gnome uprising was short-lived, and Evan got the worst. The Guardian Gnomes killed him with the crushing; but then seemed to have little further object. Oh, the walled cities they could have taken! And bounty and booty for many, for sure. But, alas, the Gnomes lacked a strong leader, and the rebellion was quelled by the Shades. And, would fair Katrina have quelled their passions? No, but she got her due. Just look out for the mushroom on the left.
Posted by stork  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  10:04 PM
Ha! I wonder if Roosevelt E. Roosevelt reads this...


"Is it too early to be this loud? TOO LATE!" - Adrian Cronauer
Posted by Rod  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  10:06 PM
Then the Prelates said, "Our only hope is with Katrina. Let's set up the moat and the battle plans at her will." Unfortunately, Gnome spies had infiltrated the seagull clan, and sand-castle remnants began arising from the dunes. "Let us acquire the Cat-tail gangs, said General Julio, and send emissary missions to the shellfish!" Therewith, the Walrus club and the Carpenter union went forth, again, but not for the proceeds, this time. Meanwhile, Katrina sat grooming her lizards.
Posted by stork  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  10:39 PM
And if you want me to believe your Rehobeth Beach Gnome lie - then just follow my tale.
Posted by stork  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  10:52 PM
This reminds me of a short story I once wrote called "The Call of the Rutabegas", about veggie uprisings and the evil Rutabegas.
Posted by Winona  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  11:04 PM
I think Stork's been associating with Hairy too much.

It's beginning to not remind me of a story my mum wrote about cabbages & kings. Mmmmm...lettuce...
Posted by Smerk  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  11:09 PM
Alas, as most investigations seem to end, there is no existing evidence of the "100-foot" tall Rehobeth Beach Gnome remaining. Indeed, there was a 25-30 foot Gnome adjacent to the boardwalk a few years ago, apparently in conjunction with a miniature golf course. But if it wasn't taken down by the owners or the city, and was, indeed, washed out to sea, then it would easily have been totally destroyed within weeks. Of course, the Prelates are still watching.
Posted by stork  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  11:09 PM
Winona, I would *love* to hear about the Rutabega uprising. Large vegetables scare me. And Smerk, I don't think your mother wrote 'The Walrus and the Carpenter'. It's a bit older than that. Perhaps, as my mother and grandmother did, she read it to you as a child. The Prelates are still watching.
Posted by stork  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  11:20 PM
I know my mum didn't write Walrus & Carpenter. I'm saying she wrote a short story called Cabbages & Kings. Moral of that story, try crop rotation and you won't get sick of cabbage.

I had a rather deprived childhood. I don't recall my mum reading me stories. I do recall acting out disney books on tape...I learnt to read pretty fast anyway, so I was reading "Alice" myself when I was five or six.
Posted by Smerk  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  11:25 PM
I posted it up on the web. Keep in mind that this was never ever edited, and it was just a silly thing that I popped out in less than five minutes. So, don't expect it to be very good.
It is at:
Posted by Winona  on  Sun Apr 03, 2005  at  11:39 PM
Comments: Page 1 of 2 pages  1 2 > 
Commenting is not available in this channel entry.