Is my baby gay?

A website called Is My Baby Gay offers to inform you of your child's sexual preferences for a fee of only $19.99. They direct customers to print out a circle on a piece of paper. You're then supposed to apply the tongue of your baby to the center of the circle for 15 seconds. You mail this piece of paper to the "Is My Baby Gay" testing center, and they promise to get back to you with an answer within two weeks. If they turn out to be wrong, they promise that they'll refund 150% of your purchase price.

At first I thought this had to be a joke, but apparently they really will take your money. They've set up a paypal payment system to do so. Which transforms this from a joke into something more like a scam. [Note: I didn't actually try to pay them anything, so perhaps at the last minute they decline to take your money... but somehow I doubt it.]

On their front page they've included a phrase which is apparently their legal escape clause: "Results are intended for entertainment purposes only."

I'd like to think that no one would actually take this site seriously and mail in their baby's saliva sample. But there's probably someone out there dumb enough to think this might be for real.

Even dumber would be someone knowing there is no such thing as a saliva test for sexual preference, but paying $19.99 anyway just for the fun of getting some bogus results.

Birth/Babies Sex/Romance Websites

Posted on Tue Sep 18, 2007


What happens when someone uses the wrong kind of paper and poisons their kid trying this stupid thing?
Posted by Cranky Media Guy  on  Tue Sep 18, 2007  at  03:08 AM
If some one is dumb enough to believe this, they shouldnt be allowed to have children.
Posted by Sam  on  Tue Sep 18, 2007  at  03:27 AM
If there is a genetic component to homosexuality, which seems valid, then DNA can be recovered from saliva and tested for the genetics involved. And this seems a safe way to get DNA from a child. However, although there is evidence of a genetic component to homosexuality, the specific genes have not been identified. So, what are they testing for? "results are intended for entertainment purposes only." OK, they've got the legal escape clause so they do not have to play by the scientific rules.
Posted by Christopher Cole  on  Tue Sep 18, 2007  at  11:45 AM
Have to agree with Sam. Frighteningly, there are enough people who are willing to shovel over the money for proof their kid is 'normal'. There are extensive 'deprogramming' centers for removing the supposed homosexual urges of children as young as six.

That these are almost exclusively church-based, it takes hypocracy to a whole new level when you read about new molestation scandals..

Besides, if DNA testing indicates the kid is gay, what does that say about the parents involved, hmmm?
Posted by Robin Bobcat  on  Tue Sep 18, 2007  at  03:48 PM
I note that nowhere does this site seem to have an address to mail the sample to, unless I actually have to print out something to get it. Is this a giveaway that the site is a joke or has it been disarmed?
Posted by Phred22  on  Tue Sep 18, 2007  at  03:59 PM
Robin, being homosexual would be a recessive trait otherwise it would pretty much be an evolutionary dead-end. Therefore, if the child is homosexual, then both parents would have a single of the recessive gene(s) and others in the families would have all the recessive and be homosexual, but not necessarily very many of them.

But, to give a positive spin on the parent's desire, maybe they want to know so that they can prepare the child for what lies ahead and avoid some of the pain that would probably happen.
Posted by Christopher Cole  on  Tue Sep 18, 2007  at  06:30 PM
Now, could sexually confused teenagers and adults also use this test to prove their sexuality, or is it limited to babies?
Posted by Dracul  on  Tue Sep 18, 2007  at  09:28 PM
It's not just genes in the kid that may influence sexuality - there's some evidence to suggest that the balance of hormones a child is exposed to while in the womb can influence it. I severely doubt we're ever going to find a 'gay gene' variant - as with many things it's a combination of genetic and environmental influences.

Anyway, it's a pretty good scam when you think about it. $20 for a piece of paper, and all they have to do is tell every single customer their kid isn't gay. The dollars paid for the 90% or so that turn out to be hetero will more than cover any refunds to parents of kids who do turn out to be gay, if those parents even bothered chasing it.
Fools and their money!!
Posted by Nefertari  on  Wed Sep 19, 2007  at  06:30 AM
Neferati, the hormone situation you speak of would activate some genes and de-activate others. At least, as I understand how it works. My chemistry isn't very good - it sucks actually, in high school my D grade was lower than two people who got F grades - but the evidence so far seems that there is at least one gene (and probably many) that control sexual orientation.

If this test actually worked, Dracul, I guess it would work on teenagers and adults also, but it's easier to get money from parents of babies.
Posted by Christopher Cole  on  Wed Sep 19, 2007  at  10:50 AM
The 'gay gene' theory seems like a non-starter. For the gay gene not to die out (homosexuals not commonly having children), there would have to be some compensating increase in the fertility of the carriers of the recessive gene, or of women carrying the gene. Such a compensating increase in fertility would have to exactly match and cancel out the fertility-reducing effect of the gene when expressed in men (i.e. gay men). If there was not an exact match, either male homosexuality would die out, or it would become predominant. Neither of these things seems to be happening. There remains the possibility that this perfect match does indeed exist, but it seems unlikely, since couples these days largely control their own fertility and don't just leave it to natural processes.
Posted by Mr Henderson  on  Wed Sep 19, 2007  at  04:22 PM
Mr Henderson, you forget that until recently the social pressure to have children was huge, even more so than now. Homosexuals married and had children, often several. Homosexuals hid the fact of their homosexuality and marrying and having children was one way to do this. As acceptance of homosexuality increases, the increasing lack of homosexuals having children may indeed breed out. And this social pressure is world-wide, not confined to just Western culture. In many parts of the world, specifically Moslem areas, admitting you are homosexual can get you killed. Given that choice, marrying and having children is a minor sacrifice.
Posted by Christopher Cole  on  Wed Sep 19, 2007  at  06:35 PM
Nobody knows for certain if gays are born that way or not. Supposedly theres evidence, we talked about it in psychology class more then once.

The only plausible way to tell is by having an MRI/CAT scan on the supposed affected area of the brain that controls this sort of thing.

Really stupid website. I oughta mail them a sample of my spooge.
Posted by River Styx  on  Thu Sep 20, 2007  at  01:19 AM
Dracul makes a good point.
Why only babies?
It seems like the natural market for this test would be Republican politicians trying to prove they're "not gay."
Posted by Big Gary  on  Sun Sep 23, 2007  at  03:54 PM
Interestingly, mr henderson, it turns out that gay people tend to be the younger siblings in families with large numbers female siblings; An Italian study found this in the case of male homosexuals to be consistent with the idea that in such familiies, the relatedness to fertile and mostly female offspring supported the birth of one or two homosexual children.

Here is a poser though; I know of a lesbian couple who are having IVF for a child of their own. They have been trying to locate a donor through the program who has gay siblings so their child will be "Inteeligent, loving and decent like ourselves " I quote. Does that seem right? And what would this technology do in their hands if it should come to pass?
Posted by D F Stuckey  on  Sat Oct 06, 2007  at  06:22 AM
I think you're right, River Styx. You have a good point.
Posted by Fairings  on  Tue Sep 02, 2008  at  11:54 PM
Huh? I've never heard of something like this. Is it only used for babies? Or can this be used for young adults?
Posted by Sandy McNeil  on  Sat Sep 26, 2009  at  04:21 PM
Sorry Sandy, it doesn't work at all.

You will have to figure out by yourself which of your schoolmates to persecute and violently assault.
Posted by D F Stuckey  on  Sat Sep 26, 2009  at  04:24 PM
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