DNA Activation

If you've studied any biology at all, then you probably believe that DNA is a two-stranded molecule shaped like a double helix. How foolish you are! Toby Alexander has revealed that DNA is actually a 12-stranded molecule. There are two visible strands, and then 10 'etheric' strands. Toby laments that scientists have never learned about the 10 other strands because scientists "have to rely on physical observations and can only validate things that they can see with their eyes and microscopes." Ah, yes. Those silly old scientists relying only on their eyes and microscopes. But Toby, armed with a B.S. in Computer Science (and a natural flair for B.S. in general), has cast aside these limitations and pioneered a whole new field of scientific discovery. He's found a way to activate this etheric DNA, thereby allowing paying clients to get exciting results such as thicker hair growth and the disappearance of varicose veins. Toby has a lot more to say about DNA, the history of the human race, and how to telepathically control the stock market, but most of it, unfortunately, is way above my head. (via Archana in the Hoax Forum)

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