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Vampire Sites
Here's a couple of vampire-themed websites sent in by visitors. First we have the Federal Vampire and Zombie Agency. According to the blurb on the site, "From 1868 to 1975, the Federal Vampire & Zombie Agency (FVZA) was responsible for controlling the nation's vampire and zombie populations while overseeing scientific research into the undead. This site is a tribute to the men and women who served in the FVZA, especially the over 4000 Agents who lost their lives fighting to keep our country safe." And next we have The Temple of the Vampire. If you want to live forever, then all you have to do is join the temple. The catch is that in order to join you have to buy their book, The Vampire Bible. That's a good sales gimmick. I should try something like that for my book, such as if you want to achieve a state of absolute enlightenment, then you have to buy my book.
Paranormal
Posted by The Curator on Wed Oct 29, 2003
no the only retarded person in here is you
Posted by edwardtheimmortal  in  ohio  on  Mon May 19, 2008  at  02:07 PM
Good comeback. I'll bet it took a lot of hardcore, non-retarded brain power to come up with that.

You're just mad because you came on here pretending to be a TOV member and were then unmasked.

Then you pretended to be a vampire with some "medical condition" and were unmasked again.

In the end, you say you're not a vampire at all and don't even have a desire to be one.

The truth is, you're full of it. If you're going to fight a verbal battle, at least know what the hell you are fighting for.

You should go join this TOV. From all that I've read here in this blog, you'll fit right in with all the lost little sheep there. I'm sure their leader will welcome you with open arms and even hand you a tissue.
Posted by Prince Charming  in  London, England  on  Wed May 21, 2008  at  01:00 AM
ToV? Isn't that the group that has the hierarchy from CoS as members, even though it is a pure white light religion?

Well, after Satanic Scriptures, I can't very well say that the CoS Hierarchy isn't white light; but that's another point for another post at some other time. I'm so sure I'm just confusing "sarcasm" with literalness. Peter, of course, would never say "We Satanists" and mean it that way.

I've seen no clannish behavior from him, or his group of Jewish friends...ok, I'm lying now.

Maybe the Elite should come on over here, from both groups, and "defend" themselves. Or maybe bash some poor fellow for having a tattoo of someone they dislike, or whatever it is the Elite do now-a-days.

Vampires? No. Energy? Of course. Undead Gods? Ok, did Romero help you with that one Nemo?

I've read ALL of the ToV literature. Lucky for me I knew someone who made it to their inner circle. He was kind enough to share all of the books with me.

In one word, it is all shit.
Posted by Detrevni Diatribe  in  www.museumofhoaxes.com  on  Wed May 21, 2008  at  11:07 AM
you say that i am a retard on here the ones who say that usually do not have the mental compacity to dress themselves in the morning i never claimed to be in the tov but my condition is real and yes i am looking for a cure, you said that the condition was "unmasked" show me the proof of this. One more thing if I am so retarded the how can I explain the theory of relitivity to my science teacher leaving him baffled, I would really like to see you try to explain it to me and get it right without looking up the internet.
Posted by edwardtheimmortal  in  ohio  on  Wed May 21, 2008  at  02:20 PM
Edward, quite frankly, you leave me baffled too.
Posted by Prince Charming  in  London, England  on  Sat May 24, 2008  at  12:53 AM
your mind is not able to grasp the complexity of mine therefore you are baffled because it moves at exatly 1% of the normal human running compacity, adn you call me a retard, hah. you think because yuor english your smarter than me well to put it frankly, Which side won the revolutionary war? exactly my country did, because of what you are doing now, thinking they were smarter than their american colonists, underestimating their will to fight and their stratigem. so next time think before you speak
Posted by edwardtheimmortal  in  Ohio  on  Mon May 26, 2008  at  04:22 PM
Edward, remind yourself of the Two Great Laws of The Alliance: "Keep secret your ways from the Humes", and "let not our pact be broken". You must honor the agreement before our peoples risk being hunted again. The Elders of both Houses set these laws in stone and blood, and they must be observed, or all is threatened. Compose yourself, child of the Dragon, and stay thy forked tongue.
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Mon May 26, 2008  at  05:16 PM
what the heck are you talking about man?
Posted by edwardtheimmortal  in  ohio  on  Tue May 27, 2008  at  01:11 PM
That's the way, feign ignorance, never let on. They cannot know the truth, ever. I will relay your rededication to the pact, for the Elders of The Moon await my report, and in their stead, I offer my gratitude. Hunt well, son of the Impaler.
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Tue May 27, 2008  at  02:55 PM
I suppose that if he actually were a tov member, then he would know what you are talking about.
Posted by Sasspra  on  Tue May 27, 2008  at  03:31 PM
Agents of Nocturne, you must wait for the sign, open the seals, and enact the Protocols. The scrolls must then be burned, and all tablets broken to dust. So commands the pact that must not be broken. The sign is nigh... listen to the Earth... our time is come
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Tue May 27, 2008  at  04:16 PM
We'll have cake. It'll be nice. Some Stella D'oro maybe, or Carvel's. No- Entenman's. Better
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Tue May 27, 2008  at  04:21 PM
ok dude i have no clue who the elders of the moon are but I have no clue how you guys think i am i have not even joined the dragul clan so how did you even found me
Posted by edwardtheimmortal  in  ohio  on  Thu May 29, 2008  at  10:41 AM
Wow, Jo. Who urinated in your cereal? You appear in writing to be a very frustrated herdling. Can you not think for yourself? Oh, wait, of course you can't. Your a sheeple. You know nothing about that which you gripe about like a little spoiled beeeatch. As I hover over your grave laughing and saying "You look really smart now, don't you?" I will remember your rantings and continue to laugh. Believe what you want. No one is twisting your little dieing arm. Do some real research, next time. Additionally, continue your life in your slow soon to "Die at a ripe old age" ranting like someone took you favorite toy. You obviously expect instant gratification and "Something for nothing".
Thank you for demonstrating here what a complete loser you are, Jo. If that is your real name.
Posted by Like_It_Matters  in  Washington  on  Fri May 30, 2008  at  06:23 PM
Edward.. I meant that you baffle me in a retarded sort of way. There is no complexity there in your mind.. just a little man lost in his little world.. overwhelmed by his own retardation. You are not a vampire.. Your only disease exists in within your own thought processes. There are no vampires and no one needs to drink human blood to survive. You are completely deluded.

Hairy Houdini.. you're not making any sense at all, mate. Sounds like you've been talking to that Nemo character.

Sasspra.. I like you!

"Nuff said.
Posted by Prince Charming  in  London, England  on  Sat May 31, 2008  at  12:43 AM
Eddie. If you're from Ohio and being so smart, why is your english so bad? I'm also sceptic about your claims of posessing an enormous brain, as most of the Mensa people I know don't feel it nescessary to point that out all the time. And please don't claim to have suffered from Porphyra. If you cannot remember the name of such a lifethreatening disease, not knowing the name of the disease you have... suffered from seems rather unlikely. Poseur.

Dario. Thank you for your kind words. Seems like there's still some sense in part of the human race.

Houdini. Good one.


I wish more people would do some proper research instead of either indiscriminately believing everything, or ignoring all not fitting into their own little world.

I've studied vampires since '82, and there's a reason why I haven't aborted my research. And I've occasionally run into TOV since '92. First the claim was to have a network with contact to vampires posessing physical form. About 10 years later I notice the vampires are spirit forms, summoned by pseudo-magickal rituals. Aleistar Crowley would've been rofling madly, had he still been here. Now technological advancement curves take a prominent seat in the TOV dogma. While the vampire is said to be eternal, denied rest or ascension, the TOV view of their focal point seems to change at an amusing pace.
Posted by Sand  in  Somewhere dark  on  Sat May 31, 2008  at  06:15 AM
Sasspra.. I like you!

"Nuff said.
Posted by Prince Charming in London, England on Fri May 30, 2008 at 08:43 PM


Thank you, Prince Charming! I like you too and it's nice to see that you and others here are able to sift through the posts and see them for what they really are.
Posted by Sasspra  on  Sat May 31, 2008  at  10:20 AM
Detrevni Diatribe, Sand in Somewhere, you have not read a thing in Temple litterature that you could wrap your little sheeple brain around. I find you full of crap when you state you have read ALL Temple litterature as anyone in the higher circles would have completed so much by then they would never share it. Did they give you access to their login and password? Why aren't you posting your sheeple rantings there? 99% of the sheeple "bleating" I read here is so un-informed it keeps me amused. Thank you for your contributions at keeping the sheeple confused, scared, and best of all in dis-belief as to the ToV.
Thank you for keeping Me laughing at you all as well. This is most amusing.
Please keep kidding yourselves so you can sleep at night. That is another sheeple contribution I appreciate.
Yes, I do expect some kind of ranting back towards me about this post. I do like to laugh at you all though. Sleep well.
Posted by Like_It_Matters  in  Washington  on  Sat May 31, 2008  at  03:09 PM
Wait for the signal. Be ready- it comes soon. The Next Cycle will be in our hands. When the silver bird lands in the nest, the sun will cry and close their eyes, and the prophecies will come to be. Be ready, it is near
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Sat May 31, 2008  at  07:41 PM
Houdini, why do you disclose so much to these unworthy sheep? Your not going to disclose "Planet X" and other such things, are you? Just let it all go. They will learn in our good time. I like your quotes, especially the way they are vaugue. Excellent work. None of these "people" need know their true world.
Posted by Like_It_Matters  in  Washington  on  Sat May 31, 2008  at  10:03 PM
All talk... No vampires... REAL ONES, ANYWAYS.

You're all full of shit. Funny, you think your precious "teachings" are so secret, yet they are easily obtainable to those who know where to look.

Your "9 Laws Of Magic" are pure gibberish... poppycock.

Imagine swearing your soul to serve Nemo forever, only to find his "magic" is nothing but pure crap????? Oh wow... where do you apply for a refund????? Oh, I almost forgot..... the Temple of the Vampire doesn't give refunds, even if their "product" fails to produce the startling "results" they promise, such as physical immortality.

You've all been had... Suckers, wake up and smell the bullshit.

Like_It_Matters in Washington: What are you, Nemo's bitch????? It's only a matter of time before the ToV crumbles of it's own idiocy.

Mark my words: Anyone searching "Temple of the Vampire" is going to find this blog. The truth is all right here.

Now, kindly go flock yourself, you fake, vampire wannabe. Your "true world" is a delusion... A scam created by the sadly non-present Nemo.
Posted by SATAN!!!!!  in  Up Nemo's Ass  on  Sun Jun 01, 2008  at  01:42 AM
A rant? No, just a quiet snicker. Trolls are so amusing at times.
Posted by Sand  in  Same place  on  Sun Jun 01, 2008  at  07:27 AM
The bird nears the nest... wait for it... all eyes will be opened, some never to see again... the tongue of flame will burn darkly... very soon now... wait for it, be ready
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Sun Jun 01, 2008  at  10:39 AM
The spider's eye has 12 children today, thirteen under the last moon... the time nears... the last offering was but one of many to come... wair for it
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Sun Jun 01, 2008  at  10:55 AM
The bird nears the nest... wait for it... all eyes will be opened, some never to see again... the tongue of flame will burn darkly... very soon now... wait for it, be ready
Posted by Hairy Houdini on Sun Jun 01, 2008 at 06:39 AM
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The spider's eye has 12 children today, thirteen under the last moon... the time nears... the last offering was but one of many to come... wair for it
Posted by Hairy Houdini on Sun Jun 01, 2008 at 06:55 AM


From the far-out nature of your posts, I see that you've finally launched into orbit. Will you let us know when the shuttle lands?
Posted by Sasspra  on  Sun Jun 01, 2008  at  11:06 AM
On the other hand, it seems LIM wants some verbal fencing. Too bad he isn't armed. Let's have a little fun, then...

"Detrevni Diatribe, Sand in Somewhere, you have not read a thing in Temple litterature that you could wrap your little sheeple brain around. I find you full of crap when you state you have read ALL Temple litterature as anyone in the higher circles would have completed so much by then they would never share it."

Odd. I never recall mentioning I've analyzed ALL their texts. And I never claimed getting them from someone else. It's quite easy to gain entry into TOV, btw.

"Did they give you access to their login and password?"

When in possession of enough information to make a proper assessment? Why? It's useless compared to other techniques. And ToGD has better thought out rituals than this, and since they started out as a moneymaking scam, then double the joke, harhar.

"Why aren't you posting your sheeple rantings there?"

Because doing that would simly lead to the removal of the posts and termination of the account. Didn't think that one through, did you? Or are you just ignorant of ToV policy?

"99% of the sheeple "bleating" I read here is so un-informed it keeps me amused."

I'd say 70-ish, though I rarely find ignorance amusing. Guess it makes you feel good, though.

"Thank you for your contributions at keeping the sheeple confused, scared, and best of all in dis-belief as to the ToV."

Seems like that's your job, though your skills as a demagogue seems rather inadequete at the moment. And you got it mixed up a bit. Shouldn't it be "complacent" instead of "scared"? I mean, if non-ToV people believed the Shurpu Kishpu, they might be a wee bit upset.

But in the end, your rambling seems more like a defence of the ToV, so you seem to have your priorities mixed up. Enlighten or confound?

"Thank you for keeping Me laughing at you all as well. This is most amusing."

Yes. You must feel good about yourself. You are after all... special.

"Please keep kidding yourselves so you can sleep at night. That is another sheeple contribution I appreciate."

Yet you try to convince us, that you're a predator and others are food? So much for secrecy.

"Yes, I do expect some kind of ranting back towards me about this post. I do like to laugh at you all though."

Umm... You're repeating yourself.

"Sleep well."

Goodnight, sweet prince. May flights of devils bring you to your rest. Pfffffh...


Rant in quotation marks brought to you by:
Like_It_Matters in Washington on Sat May 31, 2008 at 11:09 AM


So the question is: Is LIM a devout ToV member or just a troll? Drone or pest? Does it matter?



Well, I provided some links on the first page for those with interest in vampires and/or the occult. Should shave 2-5 years off studies done on your own.
Posted by Sand  in  Yep  on  Sun Jun 01, 2008  at  11:28 AM
"The bird nears the nest... wait for it... all eyes will be opened, some never to see again... the tongue of flame will burn darkly... very soon now... wait for it, be ready Posted by Hairy Houdini on Sun Jun 01, 2008 at 06:39 AM"

"The spider's eye has 12 children today, thirteen under the last moon... the time nears... the last offering was but one of many to come... wair for it Posted by Hairy Houdini on Sun Jun 01, 2008 at 06:55 AM"

Wair for it????? LMAO!!!!! Your "threats" seem like something out of a children's book. I'm sure the whole of humanity will be shaking in their boots after reading those "warnings." LOL!
Posted by Prince Charming  in  London, England  on  Sun Jun 01, 2008  at  01:07 PM
I see some people still don't get the joke, though it is getting a bit stale by now.
Posted by Sand  in  Here  on  Sun Jun 01, 2008  at  01:43 PM
Sand in Yep, You are so predictable. What makes you so frustrated is people aren't just blindly following what you or the idiots on here are trying to get everyone to believe. You probably thought to yourself one day, "Gee, I found a website where I may get some sympathy from (trolls and drones?) because my ass hurts and I dont understand things. Then I can convince them I am intelligent, then they would have to follow what I say." waa waa little beeeatch. Go back to licking yourself in your corner, "troll".
I bow to no one.
Posted by Like_It_Matters  on  Sun Jun 01, 2008  at  11:03 PM
SATAN!!!!! in Up Nemo's Ass. I am sure that is where you would like to be. Scream my little beeatch. Your ass hurts, I see by reading your constant bleats. I never claimed any affiliation with tov. That's just your obsession. Deal with it. It wont pass if you don't let it go. Now, off to slaughter with you. Make sure you "flock yourself" on the way. Not everyone who is against what you write is tov. Wow, call a shrink.
Posted by Like_It_Matters  on  Sun Jun 01, 2008  at  11:11 PM
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