The Museum of Hoaxes
hoax archive hoax archive hoax archive hoax archive hoax archive
Hoaxes Throughout History
Middle AgesEarly Modern1700s1800-1840s1850-1890s
1900s1910s1920s1930s1940s1950s1960s1970s1980s1990s21st Century2014
Loch Ness Air
Here's an eBay auction I'm sorry I missed: some guy trying to sell a box of Loch Ness air... the same air that Nessie breathes. He didn't have any takers. What gets me is that it doesn't even sound like the box was tightly sealed, so all the Loch Ness air would have leaked out by the time it arrived at its destination. But although the market for Loch Ness air hasn't taken off, there's apparently quite a strong demand for bottles of Loch Ness water. Hey, I'm going to be in Loch Ness in two weeks, so if anyone wants me to pick them up some Loch Ness water while I'm there, put in your orders now. Loch Ness soil samples are also a possibility. I'll collect any water and soil samples once I'm done sampling Nessie's Monster Mash Beer.
Posted by The Curator on Thu Aug 26, 2004

How much for the botttled water?

-SERIOUS BUYER- long face
Posted by Chris  on  Thu Aug 26, 2004  at  09:06 PM
you gotta be kidding me
Posted by jared  on  Fri Aug 27, 2004  at  03:22 PM
You had better be careful importing: importing soil samples into the US w/o declaring them can result in a HUGE fine.
Posted by RH  on  Fri Aug 27, 2004  at  03:32 PM
What exactly would be the advantage of Loch Ness air, water, or soil over any other air, water, or soil? I'm pretty sure any of the above would contain exactly equal amounts of Loch Ness Monster.

I once asked a Catholic Priest how they make Holy Water. He was very open about it: He told me he fills up a bucket (or jar whatever) from the kitchen sink and then says a blessing over it. Voila: it's Holy Water.

You could make your own Loch Ness Water in a similar fashion: First fill a glass (or other container of your choice) with tap water, then stand near it and say, "I wonder if there's a monster in there." Congratulations; you've experienced exactly what you would at Loch Ness, and saved a lot of time and money.
Posted by Big Gary C  in  Dallas, Texas  on  Fri Aug 27, 2004  at  08:17 PM
there are more religions than catholicism that use holy water, so why specify "catholic", big gary
Posted by john  in  NH  on  Sun Aug 29, 2004  at  04:58 PM
Holy water is "holy" because it's been blessed. In order for "Loch Ness" water to receive it's "Loch Nessiess" I beleive it actually has to be IN the Loch at some point...
Posted by Lothar Ignatius  on  Mon Aug 30, 2004  at  12:17 PM
For years, there was a company selling "air from the holy land" to tourists (in a sealed can like a sardine tin). A television station checked and reported that the company was located next to the Tel Aviv city dump (so the air was hardly even very fresh, let alone holy).
Posted by Jonathan Golan  in  Jerusalem, Israel  on  Mon Aug 30, 2004  at  12:57 PM
And then there's the holy water from Lourdes thing, which is quite a big market. There is genuine Lourdes holy water, but there's also a lot of scammers out there:
Posted by The Curator  in  San Diego  on  Mon Aug 30, 2004  at  01:11 PM
How much for the water and soil?
Posted by Rick Fernandes  in  Stockton California  on  Tue Aug 31, 2004  at  12:08 AM
Posted by Rick Fernandes  in  Stockton California  on  Tue Aug 31, 2004  at  12:09 AM
besides pictures, have there been any proof of nessie? just wondering.
Posted by Rick Fernandes  in  Stockton California  on  Tue Aug 31, 2004  at  01:06 AM
The pictures of "nessie" were faked, as the photographer admitted a few years ago. It was just a ploy to get more tourists.
Posted by Theresa Kingsley  on  Tue Aug 31, 2004  at  01:52 AM
To John:
The priest who explained holy water to me happened to be Roman Catholic. I assume that holy water in other denominations and other religions is similarly constituted, although I haven't researched this.
Posted by Big Gary C  in  Dallas, Texas  on  Tue Aug 31, 2004  at  11:06 AM
Actually every year the freshman students at MIT have a similar challenge, proving that right now, at this very moment that just one single molecule of air inside their lungs was in julius caesars last breath as he exhaled et tu brute
Posted by Jared  on  Tue Aug 31, 2004  at  05:28 PM
Here's a Scottish site which looks like they've gone to so much trouble they MUST be genuine!
Bottled and gift wrapped Loch Ness Water!
I wonder if there is any monster DNA in there?
Posted by Ken Macleod  in  Scotland  on  Tue Aug 30, 2005  at  07:10 PM
Commenting is no longer available in this channel entry.
All text Copyright © 2014 by Alex Boese, except where otherwise indicated. All rights reserved.