Unfortunate Last Names

I've always thought my last name was pretty bad. And I mean that in the literal sense. 'Boese' means 'bad' (or angry) in German. But its meaning wouldn't matter much if only English-speaking people could pronounce it (it's 'burr-za', as if it had an 'r' in it... not 'boose'). But I shouldn't feel too sorry for myself, because this guy in Brazil, Mr. Reinhardt Adolfo Fuck, has me beat hands down. As far as I can tell, that really is his name. He must get endless jokes about it.


Posted on Thu May 20, 2004


Wikipedia has a whole list of aptronyms! Bernie Madoff, who "made off" with investors' money, made me laugh.
Posted by waldron76  in  bristol, england  on  Thu Feb 18, 2010  at  05:31 PM
@ Lee in Boston, you may have worked with Dik Blewitt, but I dated him. Even my then senile grandmother said "what kind of name is that? Is he a porn star?"
Posted by palegreeneyes  in  San Francisco  on  Tue Mar 02, 2010  at  09:04 PM
new a guy named Dick Upright
Posted by john  on  Wed Mar 03, 2010  at  03:03 PM
There was a teacher in my high school Mr. Raper.

My dentist was Dr. Payne.
Posted by Mac  in  united state in america  on  Sun Mar 21, 2010  at  04:21 PM
One of my sisters had a Merry Christmas in her high school class. Cute, though probably not "unfortunate."

There was a Bill Crook's Food Town in Nashville, Tn.

I had a math teacher in college Dr. Swindell. Usually pronounced "Swindle."
Posted by Mac  on  Sun Mar 21, 2010  at  04:35 PM
The German name "Fokker" means "breeder," exactly what our word "fuck" literally means. In German or Dutch, the owner of a stallion that is stood at stud or a mare that is bred is the "fokker." (Doesn't mean that (s)he does it personally.!!)
In German the same word that is legitimately used is also an insult or a slang term.
Probably "fuck" came through the Germanic language Frisian or Friesian, the Germanic language closest to English. There is, or was, a Dutch aircraft engineer named Anthony Fokker. Many models of his aircraft were used by the Germans in WWII. There are many Fokker planes in production and use now.
Posted by Mac  on  Sun Mar 21, 2010  at  04:42 PM
I once worked in a lockshop and a customer who used to come in every year, dressed in some tribal gown, black as the ace of spades signed his cheque book Chief Banjo.
For some reason he used to buy a hundred Yale cylinders at a time, I guess for export.
Posted by Wittybebop  in  Southport UK  on  Mon Mar 22, 2010  at  07:02 AM
I went to school with the son of Dr. Speedy R. Nutz from Chula Vista, Ca. He was Dan Nutz. His roommate at the time was a guy by the name of Dave Cox. They thought it rather amusing at BYU to place the sign on their door that read "Cox and Nutz".
Posted by Randy  in  Kapolei, Hawaii  on  Sun Apr 04, 2010  at  03:06 AM
My last name is Plague... can't get much worse than that
Posted by Andrew  in  MI  on  Thu Apr 08, 2010  at  08:21 AM
There is a woman on the Japanese volleyball team named Yoshi Takeashita. It's not pronounced like we all want to pronounce it though. =/
Posted by Drew  in  Chicago  on  Sat Apr 10, 2010  at  12:00 AM
My name is Drew Helbig... it's really not that unfortunate but I do get the occasional... Har Har you Drew Helbig not that I mind it really. raspberry
Posted by Drew  in  Chicago  on  Sat Apr 10, 2010  at  12:03 AM
haha, i like the knocka name stated in the comments, here is a funny joke i saw about bad last names
Posted by Travis  on  Sun May 02, 2010  at  06:32 AM
One of my mother's childhood friends was a girl named Candy Cane.
Posted by Kathleen  in  the Boonies of Ohio  on  Sat Jun 26, 2010  at  07:41 PM
That is is real name, he is a professor in my university(UnB), geology teacher indeed, he is a "fucking" good teacher and researcher, P.h.D since 1975. Take a look at his curriculum: http://buscatextual.cnpq.br/buscatextual/visualizacv.jsp?id=K4787180T7
Posted by Vitor  in  Brasil  on  Thu Aug 26, 2010  at  06:32 PM
I got you all beat ... no pun intened =)
Posted by Hugh G. Rekshon  in  Here  on  Thu Sep 30, 2010  at  04:24 PM
Sorry, Hugh - we are going to have to see a birth certificate and driver's license before you can claim a prize there. smile
Posted by D F Stuckey  in  Auckland New Zealand  on  Thu Sep 30, 2010  at  04:26 PM
I was looking up Miley Cyrus' family tree to see if she's 100% pure white trash or not, and I think she had an ancestor named Hooe... HOW DO YOU PRONOUNCE THAT? Hoo-ie? Hoo? Hoe? Or are all of those wrong? And is it German? Because Haas is German, and it's fairly similar because it's another 4-letter last name beginning with H and has a double vowel in the middle, and sounds silly (but not as silly as Hooe).

There's so many people called Butz and Cox... and who could forget Smellie? I actually know an Oliver Smillie. Poor man...

And is Farton a real last name? It sounds convincing to me LOL I know Glasscock is real!
Posted by Amala  in  Sydney  on  Thu Nov 18, 2010  at  01:01 AM
"100% pure white trash"

Salt of the earth. The elite would have to wipe their own butts if there weren't any white trash. Probably couldn't tell the difference between their upper and lower orifices.
Posted by Mac  in  Hereabouts  on  Mon Nov 22, 2010  at  12:48 PM
There was a Glasscock's Grocery in Farmington, Tennessee many years ago.
Posted by Mac  in  Herenthere  on  Mon Nov 22, 2010  at  12:50 PM
I once met a person whose name was richard butram he knew how it sounded and went by dick to be funny. Can't believe parents would actually do that to their child. Now you have people naming their kid after fruit and the material jeans are made out of. Ridiculous.
Posted by breast augmentation  on  Thu Dec 02, 2010  at  10:31 PM
Richard "Dick" Armey
Posted by Courtney  in  OK  on  Wed Dec 15, 2010  at  10:58 PM
You mean people are naming their kids "Myrtle" and "Jean"? ('Cause, y'know, that's what those names are--"Myrtle" is a blueberry and "Jean" is the stuff that jeans are made out of--not denim as many suppose.)
Posted by Mike King  in  El Cajon, CA  on  Sun Jan 16, 2011  at  10:47 PM
I know a girl called Kisma Butt. And another one called Rida (like Ride a) Butt. No kidding! Though I wish they were sisters! What a pair of Butts they would make!!
Posted by Murtaza  on  Fri Feb 04, 2011  at  09:48 PM
I make up alot of last names so if you want to hear some, hear are 5 of my faves that I made up.






I hope you like them! If not, oh well. I tried. smile
Posted by Reid  on  Mon Mar 14, 2011  at  05:04 PM
There is a woman at church whose first name is Bovina. I'm not sure how it's spelled, but that is how it is pronounced.
For those who don't know what the generic term for what we usually call "cows" and "bulls" is: bovine

Bovina, NY 13740 The town name is derived from the traditional bovine dairy economy.

Bovina, Mississippi The 1988 film Mississippi Burning was filmed the area.

Bovina is a city in Parmer County, Texas 79009

Bovina, Colorado

Elena Bovina. Rus. Info
Posted by Mac  in  Everywhere! He's Everywhere!  on  Thu Apr 14, 2011  at  12:38 PM
@pittle I believe you about Naughty SeaMonkey because he is my mum's cousin. His name used to be stephen but he changed it by deed poll to Naughty. Odd right! He was a member of parliament in Wellington also for a while.
Posted by Chris  in  New Zealand  on  Mon Aug 06, 2012  at  02:05 AM
Russian male last names end in either -ov/-off (e.g. Pavlov) or -in (Putin, Yeltsin etc.). To form a female last name from the stock male surname, you have to add –a to the male surname (e.g. Mr. Putin & Ms. Putina; Mr. Pavlov, Mrs. Pavlova)

One of my mates knew a fellow with the last name “Vagin”. So when he got married his wife became Mrs. Vagina. Its pronounced “VAH-ggeena” though. But its still funny to picture the faces of immigration officers when they got to travel to English speaking countries. “Welcome to the UK, Mrs. Vagina!”
Posted by M.Tidd  on  Tue Oct 02, 2012  at  11:52 AM
I knew a guy named Peter Stroukoff. I shit you not.
Posted by Mary Nelson  in  My room  on  Mon Dec 31, 2012  at  11:12 PM
My last name is Head. And my Uncle's name is Richard. No joke.
Posted by Laura Head  in  United States  on  Thu Jan 17, 2013  at  04:23 AM
I have a coworker who's name is Cody Hathcock. I always ask him what else he hath.
Posted by Rick Mccartney  in  Texas  on  Fri Jan 25, 2013  at  12:49 PM
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