When someone wants to rent a midget, I'm apparently the first person they contact. I say this because I receive A LOT of email inquiries from people wanting to rent midgets, such as this one I got yesterday:
do you know any midget strippers that would do a wake up at a bachelor party
or this one from a few weeks ago:
Do you know if I could get 2 male midgets at my Lounge for a party this Friday Jan 25th in Chicago IL. I would appreciate a response.
It's my fault. I posted about a rent-a-midget service
years ago, and ever since then the emails from people seeking midgets to rent have continued to trickle in, usually at the rate of about one a month.
I also receive many inquiries from people who want to buy tapeworms for the purpose of dieting
, who want to know if I sell marzipan babies
, who are looking to buy a fake sun roof
, or who want to join the Nigerian navy
I'm really missing out on good business opportunities by not offering these services.
Once upon a time I was receiving emails almost daily from people seeking fake doctor notes
, but no longer. Apparently someone has usurped my position as the preferred source of information about this product.