April Fools 2005

I'll try to post about April Fools Jokes here as I find out about them. Already I've found a few:
  • Residents of Melbourne arrive at the beach to help save 'needle-nose dolphins' washed ashore, only to learn needle-nose dolphins are syringes.
  • A Taiwanese university student posted a fake story alleging that China had launched a 'decapitation strike' against Taiwan. Taiwanese authorities don't find it funny.
  • UnderGoos: Google underwear search engine (Google parody)
  • Bare Bones Software announces new software that will record critical user data onto a "durable backup medium": punchout cards.
  • UN votes to shut down the internet: the rapid and uncontrolled flow of information was destabilizing the governments of many of the member states... The Nigerian representative stormed out after the vote saying that the shutdown would destroy his country's largest source of income.
  • THIS IS REAL: Miss Wheelchair Wisconsin stripped of her crown because she can stand.
  • THIS IS REAL: BBC tries to interview Bob Marley; doesn't realize he's been dead for 24 years.
  • The Sun reports that a 650-year-old law has allowed gypsies to set up camp on the lawn at Windsor Castle.
  • The Sun also reports that "Barmy Brussels bureaucrats want to BAN April Fools' Day -- because it is too dangerous".
  • The Independent reports that Jamie Oliver (the Naked Chef guy) is going to run as a Tory candidate in the UK's next election.
  • The Mirror announced that sheep are going to be used to mow the lawn at Wembley Stadium: "the natural fertiliser of their droppings has reduced the need for chemicals meaning less allergic reaction on players"
  • The Daily Mail has published pictures of Prince Charles visiting a lingerie shop to pick out things for Camilla: "he is caught pondering over a matching camisole and apparently seeking advice from his young son Prince Harry on the delicate question of how one should invite one's wife to turn one on".
  • Giant Penguin: Tokyo Zoo announces the discovery of a new giant penguin.
  • Left-Handed Golf Ball: The Birmingham Post reports that "Sports manufacturer Dunlop has announced its plans to mass produce a revolutionary new golf ball, designed specifically for left-handed players"
  • The Melbourne Herald Sun reports that Virgin Australia has announced the debut of scratch 'n sniff barbecue-scented credit cards: "Virgin says the scratch 'n sniff card will be a hit with homesick Aussies travelling overseas."
  • SpaceDaily reports that "Bush Cancels Space Shuttle Program": "US President George W Bush declared today that he had signed a rare presidential decree canceling any further expenditure of Federal funds on the US Space Shuttle program." (thanks to Gabe for spotting this)
  • Network Working Group calls for Morality to be considered in the design of internet protocols: It has often been the case that morality has not been given proper consideration in the design and specification of protocols produced within the Routing Area. This has led to a decline in the moral values within the Internet.
  • Texas Enacts Leviticus as State Law
  • Uninvent The Wheel: BMW has an ad in today's Guardian, describing a new car they've developed that has no steering wheel. It's to make it easier for the British when they have to change the side of the road they drive on. Includes mention of a Dr. Bitt Fishi.
  • Google Gulp: Google debuts a new 'smart drink', "a DNA scanner embedded in the lip of your bottle reading all 3 gigabytes of your base pair genetic data in a fraction of a second"
  • See a graphic of a new Firefox extension
  • April edition of the UK magazine Scootering (for Vespa and Lambretta enthusiasts) includes an article about a guy who lives near a former Lambretta factory. If you ship him your scooter's tires, he'll fill them with "Genuine Innocenti Lambretta Air". (Hmm. Could be real?)
  • Astronomy Picture of the Day: Water Found on Mars
  • Encyclopedia Britannica announces a semi-hostile takeover of Wikipedia
  • From the Register: Apple founder Jobs joins IKEA
  • Also from the Register: Bush twins to join Air Force tech unit in Iraq
  • Slashdot joke: Stand outside and wave at 10 am to have your picture taken by the new Google satellite
  • Opera SoundWave: Opera announces new technology that will allow "users to communicate in real- time without the use of computers or mobile phones"
  • From Nature.com: Apollo bacteria spur lunar erosion
  • ThinkGeek announces new products including a desktop USB fondue set, and the SkyTag - Green Laser Aircraft Tracker
  • Creationists Win: Scientific American announces that it's giving up the Evolution vs. Creationism debate. The Creationists have won. (reported on SlashDot)
  • Bad April Fool: A Croatian news service announces that Croatia will be banned from participating in the World Cup Finals unless the country hands over fugitive general Ante Gotovina. The announcement sparks massive street protests. The news service then admits it was joking.
  • Bad April Fool: Man posts signs warning of mercury spill. Sets off hazmat scare, shutting down more than 10 businesses. Says it was an April Fool's prank.

April Fools Day

Posted on Fri Apr 01, 2005


I live in a real muddy area, at least this time of year... I have found that coating the undersides of my shoes with vaseline keeps the mud from sticking. Try it...
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Fri Apr 01, 2005  at  10:07 AM
HAIRY! We done missed ya.

So, did ya wreck Raoul's car, or what?
Posted by Rod  in  the land of smarties.  on  Fri Apr 01, 2005  at  10:10 AM
I know you said he's driving it, but did you at least dent the hell out of it, or have it painted green with purple stripes and pictures of Mikey J or something?
Posted by Rod  in  the land of smarties.  on  Fri Apr 01, 2005  at  10:16 AM
No, his Chariot of Fire was returned to him with no dunches or dings. I did, however, change his "Honk if you love Raoul" front vanity plate to "Bomb on Board". I'm sure didn't notice... he cursed me, challenged me to a belated duel, and booked for Down Under. He's all juiced about the Llama Tour thing, but he did seem saddened to leave my hovel. He must have found my... HEY- THAT SON OF A- He used up all my- Dammit. I shall have my revenge
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Fri Apr 01, 2005  at  10:27 AM
For anyone intrested in a forum taking revenge- check out unfiction.com. They've even made thier own commercial! It's hilarious!
Posted by Kotori  in  USA  on  Fri Apr 01, 2005  at  05:29 PM
Is it me or is this year's crop of April Fools gags just not all that funny?

I did like the Scientific American editorial, but other than that, nothing really made me laugh. Is everyone too afraid of saying something "wrong?"
Posted by Cranky Media Guy  on  Fri Apr 01, 2005  at  05:45 PM
CMG, I agree. This year's gags are rather lame.

Yay! Hairy's back! If Raoul's heading this way, I'd better make sure I'm prepared!
Posted by Smerk  in  to mischief  on  Fri Apr 01, 2005  at  09:47 PM
You've got a couple of weeks before he gets there, Smerk. He drives kinda slow, because he cooks with crockware on his exhaust manifold. I've asked why he can't drive faster anyway, but he'd never explain... I guess he just didn't want to spill the beans
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Fri Apr 01, 2005  at  10:07 PM
Wow, driving all the way here? That'll take some doing. There's a lot of water between there and here.
Posted by Smerk  in  to mischief  on  Fri Apr 01, 2005  at  10:19 PM
Ramonian cuisine is best prepared slowly, 48 miles an hour being the perfect temperature for most dishes.
Posted by Hairy Houdini  on  Fri Apr 01, 2005  at  10:22 PM
Does it have to be prepared with one of the turn signals on?

Because if so, that would explain the way a lot of old people drive... They're just "Cookin' the Raoul Way".
Posted by Rod  in  the land of smarties.  on  Fri Apr 01, 2005  at  10:36 PM
So, d'you think I'd smell him before I see him then? Hmmm...could be a bit of a problem. Does Ramonian cookery have a distinctive smell?
Posted by Smerk  in  to mischief  on  Fri Apr 01, 2005  at  10:51 PM
My school newspaper (university of arizona) had a good one today about how the board of regents voted to save money by turning off all air conditioning in university buildings for five years. It's a pretty horrible thought considering it gets up to 115 around the time fall semester starts. It was a well written article though. It was very funny if you got the joke, but not too obvious so that if you didn't realize the day you may believe it. Ahh, here it is: http://wildcat.arizona.edu/papers/98/126/01_3.html
Posted by Razela  in  Chicago, IL  on  Sat Apr 02, 2005  at  01:19 AM
Don't forget to check out the National Public Radio's annual April Fools contribution at

It seems that Maple trees are exploding in New England due to the low-carb diets and lack of syrup demand.
Posted by Bill  in  Lebanon  on  Sat Apr 02, 2005  at  04:40 AM
My boyfriend heard this story on NPR and thought it was true: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=4571982

He said "It talks about some kid dying! Why would they joke about that?!"

But I love him anyways. smile
Posted by Katey  on  Sat Apr 02, 2005  at  08:53 AM
Oh jeeze, I just posted it right after someone else did. Whoops! That's what I get for not reading the whole thread.
Posted by Katey  on  Sat Apr 02, 2005  at  08:54 AM
Peter Jackson (of Lord of The Rings Fame) released a
Production Diary video (day 123) from the set of King Kong explaining and showing pre-visualization shots of the two 'Son of Kong' sequels he's going to do. Set in WWII, Son of Kong goes after Hitler.
I especially liked his description of Kong with shoulder-mounted machine guns!
Posted by Wurzle  on  Tue Apr 05, 2005  at  11:21 AM
What would the New York Yankees want with an Australian island? I didn't even think they had a navy! (Maybe they have a submariner in their bullpen, though.)
Posted by Anonymous  on  Sat Apr 09, 2005  at  04:51 PM
Any more? I just can't stop laughing! LOL
Posted by Fairings  on  Tue Aug 26, 2008  at  07:06 AM
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