A New Kind of Moisturizer

Ananova reports that an entrepreneur down in Mexico has started selling a line of semen moisturizer:

Porn star Lyn May, who is in her sixties, is behind the company producing the cream.
Mrs May swears that the Semen moisturizer is capable of erasing wrinkles and leaves skin soft.
She told Las Ultimas Noticias: "I select attractive young man and pay them for their semen that is mixed with honey and oats to create the moisturiser."

Okay, despite the fact that it's gross to be selling this stuff, I believe that it's an urban legend that semen would work as a moisturizer. A quick google search reveals that someone has tested this out (maybe NSFW because of the general content, but all the images are SFW) and found that semen is indeed NOT a good moisturizer.

Gross Sex/Romance

Posted on Thu May 05, 2005


I'd actually heard of women using plain ol semen somewhere years ago...
Posted by Winona  in  USA  on  Thu May 05, 2005  at  09:05 PM
You're right, Alex. Not much of a moisturizer. But a really excellent breakfast food. Ladies - High protein, low carb; any questions?
Posted by stork  on  Thu May 05, 2005  at  09:05 PM
How many whores have smooth wrinkle-free faces?
Posted by Sharruma  in  capable of finishing a coherent  on  Thu May 05, 2005  at  09:37 PM
True, enough, Sharruma, but isn't that mostly from the drugs, along with the generally self-abusive lifestyle? Heck, with the plastic surgery craze going on, now, I guess we'll see even a larger gap between the $25 hookers, and the $1,000 hookers. But, if ya don't play, then ya don't pay, right?
Posted by stork  on  Thu May 05, 2005  at  10:16 PM
"You're right, Alex. Not much of a moisturizer. But a really excellent breakfast food. Ladies - High protein, low carb; any questions?" That's just nasty, man! sick
Posted by Robin Spitz-Swallows  on  Fri May 06, 2005  at  06:09 AM
May be a hoax, but the line does work occasionally.
Posted by X  in  McKinney, TX  on  Fri May 06, 2005  at  07:48 AM
So, which is it for Robin? Does she spitz, or does she swallows?
Posted by stork  on  Fri May 06, 2005  at  06:18 PM
Oh yeah, and to clarify, it's actually 'High protein, low fat, no carb.'
Posted by stork  on  Fri May 06, 2005  at  06:21 PM
That's just gross!
Posted by Myst  on  Sat May 07, 2005  at  02:40 PM
Yeah.. there's not much that can be said about that concept. One of those "I really hope it's a hoax" things, but then people will do some seriously ****ed-up stuff in the name of beauty, second only to those done in the name of longevity or virility.
Posted by Bobcat  on  Sun May 08, 2005  at  12:03 AM
Hey, is it really any different than the foreskin cream?
Posted by Maegan  in  Tampa, FL - USA  on  Sun May 08, 2005  at  06:58 AM
Wouldn't smegma be a better moisturiser?
Posted by Paul in Prague  on  Mon May 09, 2005  at  06:44 AM
Do you have any address for Ms. May's company?
Posted by felicia  in  usa  on  Mon May 09, 2005  at  10:23 AM
I am mexican. And Mrs. May is as gross as any mexican or international semen breakfast. She is like 2000000 y.o. and ugly as hell.
Great page,
Posted by Arturo  in  M  on  Mon May 09, 2005  at  08:56 PM
Well, of all the responses I might have expected to this subject, I never thought soembody who knows Lyn May personally would check in.

I, too, have doubts about whether semen is such a great skin moisturizer, but, on the other hand, the parts of women's bodies that usually have the most frequent contact with semen are, in my experience at least, generally quite soft and moist.
Posted by Big Gary in Dallas  in  Dallas, Texas, USA  on  Tue May 10, 2005  at  04:45 PM
Even if the little "swimmers" aren't the best for the skin here's another option...

VAGINAL CREAM!!! Still seems like too much trouble! sick

Posted by Mark-N-Isa  in  Midwest USA  on  Thu May 12, 2005  at  04:54 PM
it's not a hoax. people buy it, especially in japan. although i don't really see it catching on because if it works i'm sure any girl with a boyfriend/lover/husband/whatever could get it for free without the inert ingredients. another thing, grow up and get over the "gross" thing it's a part of life just like a womans period. you people sound like you're a bunch of immature kids when you post.
Posted by appreciate life  on  Sat Jul 09, 2005  at  12:54 PM
i am mexican, from mexico, we call "being busted on your face" the slurpy enchilada, it is truly the only moisturizer i will ever use, it makes my face silky smooth like juicy couture, next time you're sucking your mans dick tell him to bust on your face, rub it in and save some for later.
Posted by DIRTY SANCHEZ  in  PUERTO VIAGRA, MEXICO  on  Sun Dec 04, 2005  at  10:19 AM
"She told Las Ultimas Noticias: "I select attractive young man and pay them for their semen that is mixed with honey and oats to create the moisturiser."

mmmmm... sounds like a great breakfast!

'What's on your face AND in your bowl?'

Posted by J H  in  SF, Ca  on  Sat Jan 21, 2006  at  01:47 AM
When you rub fresh semen on your face, say if your boy just blows on you, doesnt it dry all crusty on your face? and show up kinda white? or do you clean it off?
Posted by Lyn  in  Sydney  on  Sun Jan 22, 2006  at  09:38 PM
ok so i just wanked myself and tried on my self generated "cream"...

its feels kinda odd when it dries up... not white crusty... out pulls up skin tightly..

ok gonna wash it off before i sleep.. dont wanna get it all over my bed.
Posted by weirdo  on  Sun Feb 05, 2006  at  12:18 PM
so it works? its good for you? im goina try it!!
Posted by Lyn  in  sydney  on  Mon May 08, 2006  at  09:07 PM
good idea
Posted by hmm  on  Fri Mar 30, 2007  at  09:45 PM
Just so you all know, cum is a great facial cream! My boyfriend loves to cum on my face and I've been letting him do it for months. After he sprays my face I rub it in until it's dry and then I go rinse it off. My face has never felt softer or looked smoother.

Now I make him cum all over me, especially in the areas that need rejuvenation. For instance, my feet, ass, tummy, hands, breasts, and face. It works really well if you rub it in and then rinse it off when it's dry.

Some of you might not like it because of the taste, smell, or whatever but I love it! It works wonders and I think I've become addicted to it now smile
Posted by Jessica  in  USA  on  Fri May 04, 2007  at  01:42 PM
The Made from Earth Vitamin Enhanced Moisturizer saved my face!!

In my late twenties, I tried just about every moisturizer I could find including rarified ingredient boutique lotions but my skin remained dry, hot, itchy, flaky, and I was seeing laugh lines around my eyes. I was about to give up hope until my mother, whowho has AMAZING skin, brought me the organic Made from Earth "Vitamin Enhanced Moisturizer"...

On the occasions I do try other lotions, they never measure up.

My skin thanked me after the first application. After a few days, it looked better, was less red, less chapped. Within a month or two (or less, I don't remember after 3 years) I had no lines near my eyes, my skin feels soft and comfortable unless I abuse it. When I abuse it, this lotion makes it feel better. People consistently guess my age to be 5-8 years younger than I am even though I have grey hair.

I almost never need more than a tiny amount the size of a pencil eraser to cover my face, neck and hands. (Keep the cap or it dries out.) I recommend it to anyone looking for a facial moisturizer that works as good or better than advertised. Absolutely worth the money since it last for a good 3 month period.
Posted by Tyra B  in  ny, ny  on  Sat Oct 10, 2009  at  07:07 PM
I had heard rumors about semen being an effective moisturizer and whatnot and recently I found my face looking dull and dry and I started suffering a lot of acne. So I was brave enough to start using my own man juice to see what would happen. I've been using it secretly for about a week and my face looks more vibrant and youthful than it has in ages. My pimples have cleared up and my skin is silky to the touch now. I'm serious. I didn't believe it till I saw it for myself.
Posted by GString  in  Toronto  on  Thu Oct 29, 2009  at  09:16 PM
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