Unfortunate Last Names

I've always thought my last name was pretty bad. And I mean that in the literal sense. 'Boese' means 'bad' (or angry) in German. But its meaning wouldn't matter much if only English-speaking people could pronounce it (it's 'burr-za', as if it had an 'r' in it... not 'boose'). But I shouldn't feel too sorry for myself, because this guy in Brazil, Mr. Reinhardt Adolfo Fuck, has me beat hands down. As far as I can tell, that really is his name. He must get endless jokes about it.

Identity/Imposters

Posted on Thu May 20, 2004



Comments

:-/ There was this guy that my teacher had to look up and his name was Ronald Fuck King

Also there is this girl at school named Anja Sofia Solonen Get it her initials ASS.
Posted by 2hot  on  Mon Mar 20, 2006  at  04:36 PM
Know of a gyno doctor in the area name Dick Pees
Posted by Arnold  on  Wed May 10, 2006  at  11:17 AM
The best I have ever seen was in basic training in the army. There were two soldiers; one was named Hiscock and the other Loving. The drill sergeants paired them together as "battle buddies" just so they could say "loving his cock get over here" with no comma.
Posted by dave  on  Thu Jul 06, 2006  at  12:31 PM
this one was very unfortunate and previously posted, i feel it needs to be reminded again

an application for a turkish mba student is accepted by some shool, however the guy's name is Oral Taker. -not a common name in turkish either.

3 years he spent at the usa was a total nightmare.

(i guess his parents could never think of this)
Posted by luxurysteps  on  Sat Jul 08, 2006  at  09:38 AM
My real name is Fawkes.
Posted by Meerkat  on  Sat Jul 29, 2006  at  08:14 PM
Fawkes Koral. Horrible, I know.
Posted by Meerkat  on  Sat Jul 29, 2006  at  08:18 PM
And in highschool I knew a guy called Jack Offe.
Posted by Meerkat  on  Sat Jul 29, 2006  at  08:22 PM
My grandfather's heart doctor was named Dr. Safety First. Honest!!
Posted by C. Daniel  on  Thu Aug 17, 2006  at  07:45 PM
There once was a judge in the NY Syaye court named Judge Peter Schmuck.
He would not let anyone in his court get a name change.
Posted by Mike  on  Sat Sep 30, 2006  at  06:44 PM
"he would not let anyone in his court get a name change"

So, he was truly a Schmuck, then?
Posted by DFStuckey  on  Sun Oct 01, 2006  at  09:49 PM
I had a teacher in junior high whos name was Mrs. Dick
But thats not the funny part....
She was married INTO the name by a guy whos first name was Harry.

Hilarious.
If your dumb you wont get it.
Joke format, true story.
Posted by Wills  on  Tue Oct 10, 2006  at  06:19 PM
i want to know for my homework what my last name verdugo means, and my first name ereni means. so if you can please help me to send this information to my yahoo mail.

:thank you:
Posted by ereni verdugo  on  Wed Oct 11, 2006  at  07:12 PM
One guy got sworn into the bar with me, his name was Rusty Messer...sounds right up there with Dirty Sanchez
Posted by LT  on  Tue Dec 05, 2006  at  04:11 PM
Oh, I also forgot the local attorney whose name is "Robin Cheatham" with a hard "th" sound.
Posted by LT  on  Tue Dec 05, 2006  at  04:14 PM
There used to be a gynocologist in Fairfax, VA named Harry Beaver. There was also a memeber of the credit union I worked at named Richard Head.
Posted by Chris  on  Wed Dec 06, 2006  at  11:53 AM
I've got all of you beat. I used to do flood maps for lending companies, and I once did a couple by the names of.

Husband's last name: "Ho"
Wife's mayden name: "Shit"

I can't recal their first names, but all I could think was about their children's last names.
Posted by MP  on  Tue Jan 30, 2007  at  11:51 PM
Resume just came in for a Pretti T. Bush
Posted by Inez  on  Thu Feb 08, 2007  at  01:45 PM
I have a good buddy named Mike Christmas, and his sister's name is Mary. Her friends call her "Teecee" to make it easier on her.
Posted by Bryan  on  Sun Feb 18, 2007  at  07:17 PM
ok kuntz is not pronounced cunts, its pronounced like koontz you big liar
Posted by jeff kuntz  on  Fri Mar 09, 2007  at  01:27 PM
well

I have a few. Growing up I was always teased because my last name was barney. Heres a few more.

1. Dick Wigger
2. Betty Azkica
3. Trevor Shoemaker
4. Omah Boods
5. KiKi Tinklewood
and for the chinese one

6. Shi Coksuker

These are all real names I found in my Phone book.
Posted by kara  on  Sat Mar 17, 2007  at  04:11 PM
Worked recently with a chap named Wayne King. There is a Rugby League player here by the name of Carmichael Hunt. Never heard him called Mike. Also knew of a Plumber F.L. Oats.
Posted by Graham Bolton  on  Sat Mar 17, 2007  at  04:20 PM
My last name is Bullerdick. Had a harsh time growing up as a girl with that last name-but my dad seems to suit it. It's very masculine and appeared omnious to the gentlemen who would pick me up for dates. Yet-someday, when I marry, I'll be taking my husband's last name. Hopefully it will be Smith or Jones!
Posted by Kathryn  on  Mon Mar 26, 2007  at  02:30 AM
Well, if your ever in an area where there's a WaWa (a convenient store in the tristate area) look at the coffee cups. The guy who started WaWa, his name is Dick Wood. I personally find this funny as hell.
Posted by Jenn  on  Mon Mar 26, 2007  at  05:21 PM
some very unfortunate names I've come across in my profession:

Stormy Knight (daughter named Amber - future porn star?)
Roch Gravel (pronounced "Rock")
Peter Abbott
Anita Byrd
William Williams
Cheryl Hiscock
Steve Stevens
Donald MacDonald
Barbie Dyke

Parents have 9 months to contemplate their child's name....in most cases, it's not misfortune, but parental ignorance or outright cruelty.
Posted by mag  on  Wed Apr 04, 2007  at  09:43 AM
Im my school there is one kid named Jacob Jacobs.
In my town there is a family with the last name Whitehead (everyone in the family is a redhead), they actually called their daughter Poppy, thus making it Poppy Whitehead.
My friends boyfriend is called Richard Head, he goes mental when people call him Dick lol.
My last name is Hook, I asked Mum what other names she was thinking of calling me, she said that Dad wanted me to be called Fish, thus making my name Fish Hook, I'm glad Mum chose Brad as my name instead.
A girl at my school is called Shiny Penny.
The finance officer at my school is Haddor Way (had her way).
And finnaly my Dad's best friends last name is Sane, guess what he called his son...yep Justin, making it Justin Sane.
Victor Harbor must be the place for funny names.
Posted by Brad  on  Tue Apr 10, 2007  at  04:47 AM
My father was a Rabbi. When he was studying at the seminary in Cincinnati, one of the underclassmen was Richard C. Hertz (1916-1999), who later had a distinguished career in the Chicago and Detroit areas.

They put on a skit. My father played the professor who was performing a roll call. As he called out "Who's such-and-so?", each time one student would raise his hand. When he called out "Who's Dick Hertz?", they all raised their hands.
Posted by Josh Levin  on  Sun May 13, 2007  at  07:56 AM
This is nothing suggestive, but the last name in my local telephone directory is Zebo Zzzent. Really, three consecutive Z's. He graduated last in his class, at least at the ceremony.
There used to be a Chris Shithead. He is no longer listed. Damned kids.
We do still have a Ravi Shitut and an Osama Aaflaq.
Posted by Ryan  on  Mon May 21, 2007  at  07:58 AM
THERE IS A LADY THAT WORKS AT THE SAME PLACE AS MINE, HER NAME IS BRENDA SMELLIE BUT TRIES TO TELL EVERYONE THAT ITS PRONOUNCED "SMILEY"...I AM SORRY BUT WHEN YOU HAVE A NAME THAT IS SPELLED "SMELLIE" THEN YOUR NAME IS SMELLIE (STINKY) NOT SMILEY OR SMILES!!!
Posted by MIKE FLEMING  on  Sun Aug 26, 2007  at  12:37 AM
I studied in Argentina for a semester and I can't forget one ad I saw from a beauty salon. The featured stylist's last name was Fucks and on the bottom part it has simulated pen writing: Her first name followed by her last name of Fucks and in Spanish it said to call her e.g. Elizabeth Fucks llame (Call) 456-6564. Eeminded me of the messages you see written in a bathroom stall. I confirmed that the simulated pen writing was real because I saw another company ad with another featured stylist with her first and ordinary last name written with the same message urging the viewer to call the phone number for an appointment. I told this to a couple of Argentines but they didn't see the humor unless I explained it to them. I am sure somebody or tourist called Ms. Fucks. I wish I at least took a photo to send it to Howard Stern. 😉
Posted by John  on  Fri Sep 28, 2007  at  06:02 PM
I used to go to school with a girl named Jackie Adcock, who was a quite attractive (but stuck up)prep.
Posted by David R  on  Mon Oct 08, 2007  at  02:38 PM
I knew a surgeon by the name of "Doctor Slaughter".
Posted by D. Abbott  on  Mon Oct 22, 2007  at  10:24 AM
I must add to Mr. Gorman's note.. There was indeed a Speedy Nutz. (Chula Vista is my hometown.) He had a brother named Fuzzy Nutz, also a dentist. They were members of a businessman's association in CV. Members were always glad if one of them spoke at meetings because somtbody would have to introduce them.

In mid-50's, there were two identical twins at Chula Vista High school. Their last name was DITTO.
Posted by spade40  on  Wed Oct 24, 2007  at  06:15 PM
Have to add a story originally published in Sport Illustrated a few years ago regarding the basketball team at Austin Peay University in Tennessee. (Peay is pronounced like "pea".) During basketball games, their fans' cheer was "Let's Go, Peay!". There was a very good basketball player there named Fly Williams. The Cheer became "Fly is Open. Let's Go, Peay!"
Posted by spade40  on  Wed Oct 24, 2007  at  06:23 PM
Interesting note:
Comedian/Actor Tim Allen: Allen was originally his middle name. He changed it when he started his stand-up career because he was warned that people would think he was just trying for cheap laughs with his real last name: Dick.

Also, in middle school one of my classmates' names was Ryne Rindflesh.
Evil parents, I tell you. I'm sure they thought they were very clever...
Posted by ayemossum  on  Tue Nov 06, 2007  at  05:56 PM
well, after reading all of these names, it turns out that my name can be misconstrude by a dirty mind.

Mandy Fisher (Man dee fissure)..... Cool!!
😊
Posted by Mandy Fishe  on  Tue Nov 06, 2007  at  06:46 PM
well, there was the OBGYN in Northmamton MA, Dr. Finger.

in HS my freshman year year homeroom teacher was Andrea Dakin, she was not married (Excuse me, but you must be Ms.Dakin) [hint: it's a long "a"]
Posted by douglas  on  Wed Nov 07, 2007  at  12:34 PM
my ex's last name is boner. need i say more?
Posted by Lorne  on  Wed Nov 07, 2007  at  12:40 PM
A cardiologist is Groton, Ma is named Dr Hack
Posted by Donnie  on  Wed Nov 07, 2007  at  06:52 PM
My mother claims to have known of someone named Richard Harden. I know a professor who told me about another professor named Dick Dick. Also, I used to go to school with a guy named Richie Rich (though he prefers Rich Rich now)
Posted by Emily  on  Thu Nov 08, 2007  at  05:46 PM
My elementary school principle's name was Jack Offman. Of course, I didn't understand the significance at the time, but when I got older...
Posted by Rubes  on  Thu Nov 08, 2007  at  07:48 PM
My high school chemistry teacher's last name was Heurtin (pronounced "Hurtin'"). He had two army buddys whose last names were Ill and Payne. This was in Lake Charles, LA

Also a frequent customer at the store I worked at in high school was named Human Clump. I'm not sure if it was spelled with a C or K. It was apparently a typo on his birth certificate, but in 70 years he never changed it.
Posted by TH  on  Sun Nov 11, 2007  at  03:46 AM
there is an anesthesiologist in my home town named dr goodnight. i also deliver mail to a dr. johnson wang.
Posted by karen  on  Sun Nov 11, 2007  at  05:41 PM
i deliver mail so we see all sorts of "fancy" names. Anita B pleasant, anita hug,wai wong, harry s dong,mr. ho ho. the last resident that i deliver mail to on my routes name is mr. farewell.
Posted by karen  on  Sun Nov 11, 2007  at  05:49 PM
This is not surname, but still pretty bad. In Perth, Western Australia, there is a bay called Cockburn Sound. The local residents pronounce it as "Co-burn Sound". I pronounce it as "(loud painful scream)".
Posted by Lokop252  on  Sun Nov 11, 2007  at  09:45 PM
Here on Orkney, 'Twatt' is an incredibly common name.

There's also a road called Twatt.

I remember the local paper running a caption competition, featuring someone standing with the Twatt sign pointing directly at them.

I was bullied mercilessly by a guy in my class called Keith Twatt, leading to many exchanges such as :

Keith - hurrr hurr , you suck.
Me - shut up Keith, you're such a twatt !

😉 and after all, he could hardly deny it !
Posted by Rosslyn  on  Mon Nov 12, 2007  at  08:38 AM
I met an Asian Guy years ago in jail...seems he is always in trouble with the cops-- They ask his name, and he tells them "Phuc Ewe"
His dad was met his mom in the Viet Nam war...his last name was Ewe...and he obviously had a sense of humor!!
Posted by Jim  on  Thu Nov 15, 2007  at  07:55 AM
I went to high school with Marc Bader (long "a"). We called him Master Bader.

The manager of an apartment building I once lived in was K. LUTZ.
Posted by Jean-Philipe  on  Mon Nov 19, 2007  at  02:42 AM
strange but true.... the local conductor of the Johannesburg Symphony Orchestra is one Mr. Dick Cock.
Posted by Baffersty  on  Mon Dec 03, 2007  at  06:01 AM
I dealt with a guy from another office whose name is Richard Payne, and yes he did go by Dick. I would have a call transfered to me that would say "Dick Payne, Line 1" I would just say "No Thanks!"
Posted by Ed  on  Fri Dec 07, 2007  at  01:35 PM
Worked with a guy years ago as a welding inspector--- his name was Dick Head--- not Richard--- Dick.
Posted by Dale  on  Wed Dec 12, 2007  at  09:20 AM
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