Hoax Museum Blog: Religion

The Church of Beer — If you love beer, then this is the church for you: The Church of Beer. It really is a church. If you're ordained as one of its ministers, then you can legitimately perform wedding services. But by its own admission, it doesn't take itself that seriously. I signed up to join right away. I'm even tempted to become an official Church of Beer minister, but I'm not sure about shelling out $15 for the honor.

Church of SpongeBob Squarepants — Are you bored with mainstream religion and ready, eddy, eddy for something different? Then why not consider converting to the Church of SpongeBob Squarepants? In fact, you probably don't even have to give up your existing faith. Spongebob is quite ecumenical, in this regard. To convert all you have to do is "drop on the deck and flop like a fish." (Thanks to Alex... that's someone else named Alex, not me... for the link).

Get a text message from Jesus — Here's a news story from a couple of weeks ago that I missed. This Finnish company promised that if you sent their service a text message prayer, you would receive a response from Jesus Christ himself. And Jesus would only charge the very reasonable price of $1.52 per prayer.

The Jesus Pizza Project — Around the world hungry hackers and coders are about to eat pizza. But the question that vexes them is this: what if there is an image of Jesus hidden in that pizza? Now the JesusPizza Project will harness the power of thousands of computer users, via the miracle of distributed computing, to search images of those pizzas that are about to be eaten, to find out if one of them contains the image of Jesus. Just like the Seti-at-Home project, you download some software. When your computer is in screensaver mode this software goes to work, scanning downloaded images of pizzas. (Thanks to Phil Carmody for the link)

Cheesy Jesus — Behold the power of Cheesus! Cheesus Industries manufactures and sells "premium quality, religious-themed cheese sculptures." That would be statues of Jesus made out of cheese. Of course, there's nothing to stop someone making a statue of Jesus out of cheese and selling it, but in this case there's no way to buy what Cheesus Industries claims to be producing. In reality, Cheesus Industries appears to be a satirical promotional tool for the 'cheesy' lounge singer Richard Cheese.

I See Jesus — Pareidolia is defined as the perception of meaningful images in random patterns. In other words, seeing things that aren't really there. For instance, people might see a face in a cloud. Or they might see the Virgin Mary in the window of a Boston hospital. When people start seeing religious images on the walls or windows of buildings, it almost always leads to good business for the business affected, as massive crowds flock there to see the image. So now there's a company calling itself ISeeJesus.com that will facilitate the appearance of religious images at your place of business via 'special prayer techniques.' How you take advantage of the crowds that will then flock to see the image is up to you.

Diet Holy Water — If you're feeling a little sinful, wash away your sins with some Diet Holy Water. Now, I don't think this is a hoax in the sense that this stuff isn't really for sale. Instead I'm linking to it because it seems like a marketing effort that has tongue firmly in cheek.

LordCo Centre — The religiously inclined can find shops tailored to their needs over at the LordCo Centre Mall. Book a cruise on Noah Cruise Lines, or have all your financial needs taken care of at MeccaBank. (Warning: the site automatically plays obnoxious music).

The Jedi Religion — I wrote in my book about the burgeoning Jedi movement throughout the world. For instance, when the 2001 census was taken in Britain, tens of thousands of people listed 'Jedi Knight' as their religious affiliation on the census forms. I've actually heard from a source in the Office of National Statistics that when the figures were all counted, there ended up being more Jedis than Jews in Britain. Now we have more proof of the growing stature of 'Jediism': the quasi-official website of the Jedi Religion.

Plug n Pray — Here's a product that we need more than ever! It's Plug 'n' Pray. The software kit that easily allows you to convert to a new religion. As the blurb on the website says, "Do you need to change religion to grab the chance for a career outlook? Are you going to work abroad? Getting a new customized god is easy with Plug'n'Pray. A new spirituality and a new respectability can be yours at a mouse click." I especially like the 'Switch Kits' available in the Palestine and Ulster editions. These offer two religions conveniently packaged in one kit. Again, as the website explains: "Are you on the border where religious communities mix and discrimination rages? Switch religion with the Plug'n'Pray Switch Edition and choose the most convenient one for your present situation." (Thanks to Richard for the link).

Jesus Face — Face of Jesus seen in ozone hole (via Liquito).

Mother Teresa Hoax — Rationalists describe Mother Teresa's miraculous cure of Monica Besra's abdominal tumor as a hoax.

The Nature of Reality — Interesting discussion of the nature of reality. Posits three positions: 1) Reality is hidden and unknowable; 2) Reality is attainable; 3) We can't agree about reality. (via RealityCarnival).

Jesus Freakin — Here's a curious website just sent in by a visitor: JesusFreakin.com. It's the homepage for a new role-playing game in which you get to play Jesus Christ, who's just returned after 2000 years and is ready for revenge. The game has tag lines such as 'The time has come to thin the flock,' and 'After 2000 years, he's ready to cast the first stone.' In my opinion, it's definitely a hoax. First of all, the site and graphics are pretty amateurish, given that it's supposedly produced by a video game company (Last Stone Studios). Second, there's no evidence that this company exists. It lists a business address on a press release it issued, but this address is just a p.o. box at a Mail Boxes etc. Finally, just reading through the site, it seems pretty obvious that it's satire. But the website does link to a CafePress page where you can buy Jesus Freakin merchandise. My guess is that whoever created the site is trying to be controversial as a ploy to sell a few t-shirts.

Afterlife Telegrams — Afterlife Telegrams: Terminally ill volunteers will memorize your messages and, upon death, deliver them to your friends and family on the other side

We Want Your Soul! — Cute hoax website: WeWantYourSoul.com. Though it's more of a spoof than a hoax, I'd say, since I don't think anyone is actually going to believe they're going to get money out of this.

Genuine Holy Water from Lourdes — Scam Alert! A company is sending out spam directing people to a website (http://www.0te.com/3) that sells genuine Holy Water from Lourdes. They boast that it's a miracle cure. "Holy Water can save you where medicine failed!" they proclaim. And it's yours for only $39.95. I'm tempted to believe that if you pony up $39.95 they really will send you genuine holy water from Lourdes. That's not the scam. The scam is that you can head on over to lourdeswater.com and buy the same stuff for less than half the price. So this company is tricking people into paying them $39.95 for a product that they then order elsewhere on the web for only $15. That's a nice scam and a quick way to pocket $25. I was curious who the website 0te.com was registered to and checked it out on whois.org. Turns out it's registered to some guy named Mike Richardson who lives in Atlanta, Georgia and works for a company called n26.com that sells teeth-whitening products. That's an odd combination of products: teeth-whiteners and Holy Water. Maybe you can gargle with their overpriced Holy Water after brightening your smile. Thanks to Philip Richmond for giving me a heads up about this holy water scam.

Not What You Expect — Super-Models-With-See-Through-Tops.com

Absolution Online — Is the weight from your sins hanging heavy on your shoulders? Just visit Absolution Online, home of the Virtual Confessional, and your burden shall be lifted.

Popeface — Here's the latest thing making the rounds in Italy. It's Popeface! Supposedly a picture of the Pope taken during the '80s in which he's sticking his tongue out and making a strange grimace. Prints of it are being offered for sale at popeface.com. Of course, the seller doesn't specify how much he's asking for it. He only tells you to email him for more info at his hotmail account. And strangely, he's also offering the domain name 'popeface.com' for sale. So this has all the markings of a hoax. (Thanks to an anonymous Italian visitor for alerting me to this).