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Hoax Museum Blog Posts From
November 2005
Altmann Tube-O-Lator Lacquer — Status: Bogus (almost definitely) Altmann tube-o-lator lacquer is a coating-compound that you can rub on semiconductor chips found in devices such as CD-players, DVD-players, Preamplifiers, or Power-Amplifiers. And somehow this coating will change the way those chips process sound. Whereas before the sound was cold and harsh, after rubbing a bit of tube-o-lator lacquer on, the sound is warm and rich. The tube-o-lator website states: The ALTMANN “TUBE-O-LATOR" lacquer is applied only…
Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2005.   Comments (15)

Who Buried Paul McCartney? — Status: Documentary A Dutch TV station, omroep.nl (I think it's a TV station), has an interesting documentary online about the Paul Is Dead hoax. The documentary is in English, but with Dutch subtitles. I had to select the Real Player option to get the video to play. The documentary contains interviews with many of the key players in the events of 1969, including Russ Gibb (the Detroit DJ whose broadcast about the Paul is dead rumor brought it to the attention of a national audience),…
Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2005.   Comments (9)

The Silent Movie Actress Archive (Corporeal Memorabilia) — Status: Art Project The website of the SMA (Silent Movie Actress) Archive claims that: We are a small and dedicated organisation based in Baltimore, USA. Our aim is the ‘resurrection’ of actresses from the Golden era of silent cinema. To do this we are securing a large body of quality genetic material from a variety of sources which is subjected to rigorous testing to ensure its validity. Samples range from small tissue and blood samples to full bones and several preserved organs. Is…
Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2005.   Comments (4)

Blacklight Power and Hydrinos — Status: Most likely a free energy scam An article in the Guardian about Dr. Randall Mills, founder of Blacklight Power, has been generating a lot of debate in the blogosphere. For instance, there's discussion of the article over on Slashdot, and a link to it also got posted in the hoax forum. I wanted to add a few comments here because, although many people might be hearing about Mills for the first time (thanks to the Guardian article), the guy has actually been lurking around since…
Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2005.   Comments (28)


Spooky Images — Status: Photographs with blurry objects in them Edna Barrie sent me this series of images that's circulating around. It's accompanied by the caption: If You Don't Send This to at Least ten People in the Next 2 Hours You will Forever have Bad Luck.....If You do...Something Good Will Happen to you in the Near Future!!!! Good Luck. What I can't understand is why over-exposed and double-exposed images would cause anyone bad luck. But as it is, I'm slated for permanent bad luck because I…
Posted: Mon Nov 07, 2005.   Comments (29)

Mosquito Anti-Teenager Device — Status: Real The Sunday Mirror ran an article about a device, called the Mosquito, that promises to allow shopkeepers to get rid of the crowds of surly youths who like to congregate outside their shops. The article states: The machine, which is hidden within the lights of corner shops, uses ear-splitting ultrasonic soundwaves. It is being hailed as the answer to clear away underage drinkers and vandals from the doorways of late-opening stores. The 9in-high device - called the Mosquito…
Posted: Mon Nov 07, 2005.   Comments (35)

Sea Serpents Are Really Whale Penises — Status: Interesting theory It's long been argued that when people report seeing sea serpents, they might actually be seeing floating logs, strange waves, or shadows on the water, and mistaking these things for sea serpents. Now Dr. Charles Paxton has come up with an interesting extension of this theory. He argues that people might also be misidentifying whale penises as sea serpents. He presents this theory in the current issue of the Archives of Natural History. As an example he uses…
Posted: Sat Nov 05, 2005.   Comments (24)

Patent The A and Patented Storylines — Status: Patent the A is satire; patented storylines is serious The Ecchi Patent Company claims to hold a patent on the letter A: The rights lie with us for all forms of the letter A, including, but not limited to, uppercase, lowercase, accented, Cyrillic, put in a little circle (e-mail users please note), in code, and in any form we may not have thought of already. Supposedly you need to obtain a license from them in order to use the letter A in any form: "we will soon begin…
Posted: Fri Nov 04, 2005.   Comments (14)

Grand Canyon Skywalk — Status: Real My wife emailed me this image, wondering if it was real. Yes, it's real. I think it's been circulating around for a while. It's one of those once-in-a-blue-moon kind of emails in which all the information is actually correct: New Grand Canyon Sky walk * Scheduled to open Jan. 1, 2006 Hualapai Indian Reservation * Juts about 70 feet into the canyon, 4000 ft above the Colorado River * Will accommodate 120 people comfortably * Built with more than a million pounds of…
Posted: Fri Nov 04, 2005.   Comments (47)

Strunk & White: The Opera — Status: Real Most people, I assume, are aware of Strunk & White's Elements of Style. It's hard to get through high school without being exposed to it. Now, at long last, that classic grammar and style guide has been put to music. Composer Nico Muhly created an operatic song cycle based on the book. He calls it "The Elements of Style: Nine Songs," and it was performed last month at the New York Public Library. When I first heard about this I thought it was some kind of early April Fool's…
Posted: Thu Nov 03, 2005.   Comments (7)

Wall of Fake Breasts — Status: Real Wall, Fake Breasts Retailers are always coming up with new gimmicks to help their customers. I'm surprised none of them have thought of this before (reported in the Hindustan Times): Men who want to woo their ladies by buying them sexy-scanty upper garments, but don't know their sizes, need not look confused anymore, as a designer in Netherlands has made their job much easier by creating a wall of fake breasts to help male shoppers buy bras that fit their wives or…
Posted: Thu Nov 03, 2005.   Comments (13)

Panexa — Status: Parody Panexa is a drug you need to take, no matter what may, or may not be, wrong with you. As the Panexa site states: No matter what you do or where you go, you're always going to be yourself. And Panexa knows this. Your lifestyle is one of the biggest factors in choosing how to live. Why trust it to anything less? Panexa is proven to provide more medication to those who take it than any other comparable solution. Panexa is the right choice, the safe choice. The only choice.
Posted: Thu Nov 03, 2005.   Comments (15)

Mindbending Software — Status: Art Project Mindbending Software claims to offer programs that will insert subliminal messages into the favorite computer games of your kids, thereby reprogramming them, as they play the games, to do as you wish. Their website states: Mindbending Software Inc. is a company specialized on psychological conditioning software packages for children. With the newest technologies our products infiltrate the computer games of your kids and mingle various subconscious or conscious…
Posted: Thu Nov 03, 2005.   Comments (6)

Chris Elliott Falls for Boilerplate — Status: Hoax claims victim In my Gallery of Hoax Websites (which I created about four years ago, and which has since been superceded by the Hoax Websites category of the weblog), I list the website of Boilerplate, the Victorian Era Robot. The site details the history of a robot named Boilerplate who was supposedly created during the 19th century in order to replace humans in combat. I admit that the site had me going for a while, and that I only realized it was a hoax when I tried to…
Posted: Wed Nov 02, 2005.   Comments (4)

Chinese Company Bids $450bn for Exxon — Status: Hoax I find this very strange. A Chinese company, King Win Laurel, has filed paperwork with the SEC indicating that it's planning to make a bid to buy oil giant Exxon for $450bn. But analysts are dismissing the bid as a prank, since King Win Laurel doesn't have the kind of money necessary to make good on such an offer. Apparently King Win Laurel has a history of making hoax bids. Last year, for instance, it made a fake bid to buy Telstra. It also tried to buy a New Zealand firm…
Posted: Wed Nov 02, 2005.   Comments (5)

Yorkshire Man Raped By Dog — Status: True The following story has been circulating around, even getting posted in the hoax forum (warning: don't read it if you're easily offended): Extract from the Yorkshire Evening Post: A drunk who claimed he had been raped by a dog was yesterday jailed for 12 months by a judge. Martin Hoyle, 45, was arrested by police after a passing motorist and his girlfriend found a Staffordshire bull terrier, called Badger, having sex with him at the side of a road in Huddersfield, West…
Posted: Tue Nov 01, 2005.   Comments (22)

Number Two Appears in Eye of Hurricane — Status: Real Viewers of NBC2 saw something strange during the station's coverage of Hurricane Wilma. In the Doppler loop video of the storm coming ashore, the number two suddenly appeared in the eye of the hurricane, formed momentarily by the swirling clouds. The number is so perfectly shaped that it seems like it has to be fake (some form of over-the-top station self-identification). But apparently it's real. The station swears that the image hasn't been altered, and they've provided…
Posted: Tue Nov 01, 2005.   Comments (32)

HETRACIL Anti-Effeminate Medication — Status: Hoax According to the HETRACIL website, "HETRACIL is the most widely prescribed anti-effeminate medication in the United States, helping 16 million Americans who suffer from Behavioral Effeminism and Male Homosexuality Disorder." In other words, it's supposedly a drug to treat homosexuality. The look and feel of the site is pretty convincing, perfectly imitating the bland soothing nature of other pharmaceutical sites. And it's plausible that some drug company could try to…
Posted: Tue Nov 01, 2005.   Comments (25)

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