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“Australian giant spider invasion” is a hoax
Posted: 09 May 2009 09:07 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 12 ]
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ZeldaQueen - 10 May 2009 12:48 AM

Dunno if they’re venomous, but I’d swear my bathroom suffered a spider invasion just last week. They’d all converge at the part of the ceiling in the bathroom shower stall while I was taking a freaking shower.  shut eye

I have a rice-picker hat hanging on the wall beside my bed that I brought back from Japan (trust me, it’s a pain in the arse getting a large straw hat on the Shinkansen, through Tokyo, on 3 flights and still manage to get it home in one piece) and a few weeks ago I nudged it by accident, and this God-damn massive spider ran out from under it across the wall, then back under again. The thing must have been sheltering there for ages. About 2 feet from my head.

Needless to say the big bastard got a one-way ticket to Pooville courtesy of the Porcelain Express. Next stop, Watery Grave.

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Posted: 10 May 2009 01:37 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 13 ]
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Renquist - 10 May 2009 01:07 AM
ZeldaQueen - 10 May 2009 12:48 AM

Dunno if they’re venomous, but I’d swear my bathroom suffered a spider invasion just last week. They’d all converge at the part of the ceiling in the bathroom shower stall while I was taking a freaking shower.  shut eye

I have a rice-picker hat hanging on the wall beside my bed that I brought back from Japan (trust me, it’s a pain in the arse getting a large straw hat on the Shinkansen, through Tokyo, on 3 flights and still manage to get it home in one piece) and a few weeks ago I nudged it by accident, and this God-damn massive spider ran out from under it across the wall, then back under again. The thing must have been sheltering there for ages. About 2 feet from my head.

Needless to say the big bastard got a one-way ticket to Pooville courtesy of the Porcelain Express. Next stop, Watery Grave.

Ohh, nasty. Reminds me of when my mom tried to kill a giant thousand-legger. It fell on the floor and my mom went to see if she killed it. The bugger was still alive and ran right past her feet and into the closet.

On the topic of the spiders of Australia, the description of the “spiders” is giving me the shakes. The thought of holding a dead one in your hand is enough. Brrr….

I’m glad no one photoshopped pictures for it or something.

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Posted: 10 May 2009 02:23 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 14 ]
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Who needs to worry about photoshopping the critters?  They’re creepy enough as it is.

All I can say is that I’m fecking glad I don’t live in Queensland.

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Posted: 10 May 2009 09:01 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 15 ]
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Smerk - 10 May 2009 06:23 AM

Who needs to worry about photoshopping the critters?  They’re creepy enough as it is.

All I can say is that I’m fecking glad I don’t live in Queensland.

It is so discreet it does not even like to spin a web.

I’m now picturing it sidling up to its prey, looking slightly embarrassed, and saying “Excuse me, would you mind too much if I were to eat you?”

LOL

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Posted: 10 May 2009 09:10 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 16 ]
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Madmouse - 10 May 2009 01:01 PM
Smerk - 10 May 2009 06:23 AM

Who needs to worry about photoshopping the critters?  They’re creepy enough as it is.

All I can say is that I’m fecking glad I don’t live in Queensland.

It is so discreet it does not even like to spin a web.

I’m now picturing it sidling up to its prey, looking slightly embarrassed, and saying “Excuse me, would you mind too much if I were to eat you?”

LOL

Brachypelma Leslie Phillipsi?

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Posted: 10 May 2009 10:09 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 17 ]
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Smerk - 10 May 2009 06:23 AM

Who needs to worry about photoshopping the critters?  They’re creepy enough as it is.

All I can say is that I’m fecking glad I don’t live in Queensland.

Oh my freaking GOD!
I clicked that against my better judgement…eek.

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Posted: 10 May 2009 10:37 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 18 ]
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Do NOT look up a picture of a Middle Eastern Camel Spider. Runs at 15 miles an hour, jumps high, size of a dinnerplate.

You won’t sleep for days.

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Posted: 10 May 2009 11:25 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 19 ]
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Smerk - 10 May 2009 06:23 AM

Who needs to worry about photoshopping the critters?  They’re creepy enough as it is.

It’s kind of cute, actually. . .

Renquist - 10 May 2009 02:37 PM

Do NOT look up a picture of a Middle Eastern Camel Spider. Runs at 15 miles an hour, jumps high, size of a dinnerplate.

You won’t sleep for days.

You forgot to mention the parts about how they eat camels, inject an anesthetic so that they can gnaw off your arm in your sleep without you even noticing, and will charge at you making a screaming sound while they attack.

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Posted: 10 May 2009 11:29 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 20 ]
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Renquist - 10 May 2009 02:37 PM

Do NOT look up a picture of a Middle Eastern Camel Spider. Runs at 15 miles an hour, jumps high, size of a dinnerplate.

You won’t sleep for days.

You mean like THIS? cheese  LOL

My son spent a year in Iraq on active duty, he was terrified of the things. (He has said that they are EVERYWHERE around the forward fire bases. Apparently he and the other guys on patrol would use them as veryfast moving target practice.) big surprise  cheese

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Posted: 10 May 2009 11:40 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 21 ]
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Accipiter - 10 May 2009 03:25 PM
Smerk - 10 May 2009 06:23 AM

Who needs to worry about photoshopping the critters?  They’re creepy enough as it is.

It’s kind of cute, actually. . .

Renquist - 10 May 2009 02:37 PM

Do NOT look up a picture of a Middle Eastern Camel Spider. Runs at 15 miles an hour, jumps high, size of a dinnerplate.

You won’t sleep for days.

You forgot to mention the parts about how they eat camels, inject an anesthetic so that they can gnaw off your arm in your sleep without you even noticing, and will charge at you making a screaming sound while they attack.

They’re also capable of using heavy artillery, stripping down and reassembling a kalashnikov in under 3 minutes and opening locked doors.

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Posted: 10 May 2009 11:45 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 22 ]
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Renquist - 10 May 2009 03:40 PM

They’re also capable of using heavy artillery, stripping down and reassembling a kalashnikov in under 3 minutes and opening locked doors.

That’s an exaggeration.  They can only manage light artillery.  Mountain howitzers at best.

It’s the barking tarantulas of Australia who can use the 800mm cannons.  They don’t use them often, though, as there isn’t much left for them to feed on afterwards.  So they only use them to make their burrows.

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